Shhhh....I'm thinking!

The Very Hard Difficult Journey of Losing Weight and Gaining Self-Discipline

2011-11-05T10:58:00.000-07:00

Loving the beautiful fall color's!

So losing weight is not proving as easy as I thought it would be. I really thought that hardest part was saying "no" to food I wanted to eat and dealing with some hunger. This has not been the case. The hardest part has been my plateau! Very quickly into my weight loss journey, the weight loss stopped. So I had lost 12lbs, and then....nothing. For 4 weeks, even though I was counting my calories and exercising...nothing. Well, actually that's not completely acccurate. I actually began to gain weight while doing about 1300 - 1400 calories and exercising several hours weekly. So I searched the world via google for answers and I found lots of different advice. One of the pieces of advice was go off my diet for an entire week and then start back. I decided to try that, and sure enough I began to feel hungry again. So I thought, Aha! I have found the problem and fixed it.

Not so. After I went back on my diet, I have lost what I had gained during the other plateau and 1 additional pound, but so far the weight loss is just not happening.

I know that bodily exercise profits me very little, spiritually speaking. But I made a commitment to keep on doing the self-discipline of exercise and counting calories, even if I don't lose weight, solely for the purpose of learning self-discipline. At this point I'm counting calories anywhere from 4 to 7 days per week. I'm exercising hard from 180 minutes to 240 minutes.

To be honest, I'm discouraged. It's hard to keep doing stuff like this when I'm not seeing the results that I want to see. I'm having to find motivation totally not related to the scale.

So I'm relying on this verse right now (next week it may be a completely different verse or goal that motivates me):

"I discipline my body and bring it into subjection, lest, when I have preached to others, I myself should be disqualified." ~ I Corinthians 9:27

I don't want to be disqualified from serving my God because I lack the discipline to bring my body into subjection. I don't want to be a hypocrite before my children or others when I tell them that we should live in obedience to God. So I keep doing what I'm supposed to do with my body. Hopefully, it will eventually show on the scale and in my pants size.

Treasures from Granny and REAL Treasures

2011-10-02T16:27:00.000-07:00

Top left: Nana Shirley (my mother in love's sister), Top Right - Marty (my mother in love) and bottom center - Granny Manders

A good man leaveth an inheritance to his children's children: and the wealth of the sinner is laid up for the just.
(Pro 13:22)

After my husband's grandmother died, I was asked if I wanted anything of her belongings. I was honored to be offered anything of this dear woman's and was careful to get things that would not be of value to other's, but I have valued them ever since!

One of my treasures that I came away with was a crocheted egg that opened up and had a little crocheted chick inside of it. Many other's had already passed over that, and I thought it would make a delightful church toy for my little ones, who were babies at the time. It's hard to make noise in church with a soft crocheted chick! I think 4 of my children have enjoyed this little treasure. I have no idea what the story is behind this little crocheted egg. I don't know who made it or why...and definitely not "how"! I only know that it was important enough to this very neat and tidy home maker to earn a place in her home. Now, my kids all ask if they may have this treasure one day.

Adorable crocheted egg.

Here is the little chick inside!

Another treasure I was given from Granny's estate was some crocheted doilies. I can't find my favorite one, a lovely pink and green doilie (I think I let my daughters use it in her room because it's pink and green). There was a variety of color amongst them and they remind me of all the grandmother's in my life...both mine and my children's.

I absolutely LOVE one thing that I had found from her home- a small book that she acquired from the bank apparently, that had "1003 Household Hints" in it. This little treasure was originally copyrighted in 1948 and it has some of the best tips! This little book cost .50¢ at the time. It's so wonderful to read a book from an era when women staying at home was valued and considered a great credit to one's family. Oh, don't get me wrong, I know lots of women still worked. But I think over all, stay-at-home wives were highly valued. Working outside the home was a necessary evil, not an exalted goal. It includes hints such as:

19. Tenderize chicken and other fowl by rubbing them inside and outside with lemon juice after cleaning and before rinsing.

514. Clean your candles with cloth dampened in alcohol.

516. You'll prevent the inside of your salt shaker metal top from rusting if you paint it with ordinary nail polish. When the lacquer is dry, use a darning needle to open the holes from the inside out. (Wish I had found this tip sooner. Guess who's favorite salt shaker has a little bit of rust forming on the inside?)

I actually rescued this little book in a pile of papers, cards and things that they were going to throw out. I love this little treasure. I've contemplated framing it and hanging it on the wall, but then I couldn't read it, could I?

One last treasure that I was given was actually given to me by Granny herself, while she was still alive. She told me about how she used to collect "green stamps" and then use those to buy stuff with. She decided she wanted to give her mother-in-law a set of China for their anniversary one year, so she saved and saved her stamps. She purchased this China set with her savings. So this belonged to my husbands great grandmother originally. When I first got it, I thought it was ugly BUT I loved it because Granny Manders chose me to give it to! Talk about feeling special! Today, I love this pattern. I think it's beautiful. She told me when she gave this to me that her mother-in-law had never used it. She had stored it in her attic, and she had never used it. Now, I have it and I've never really used it...which goes against every fiber of my being usually. I have always said I didn't want to be the "good towels are for company" kind of person. Who is there out there that is more "special" to me than my husband and kids? Maybe I need to plan a special meal real soon for my family, complete with China, eh?

Does anyone know anything about this China? What year was it from? I've googled the info on the back, to no avail. The name of the pattern is Whirl, by Meito

None of these treasures will leave this earth with me. What really makes them a treasure is who or what they represent. The real treasure is the people that have loved these items, used these items and given these items. I can think of no better way to show my family that I treasure them than by being a homemaker. I love being a homemaker!

Idolatrous Homeschoolers

2011-09-08T14:20:00.000-07:00

I've been home schooling for 14 years now, and I've been noticing something about some of these wonderful people. They take their role as a parent very seriously and more importantly, they take their responsibility to teach their children about the Lord as a holy ministry. There is no doubt about it...they are fully committed to their children.

Sometimes, that's the problem that I see. Occasionally, I meet people who are too committed to their children or to home schooling! For some Christian women this is sacrilege to even suggest that there is too much commitment to their God-given job. How can there be too much commitment when it comes to a job that God has given us?

Speaking from experience, it's actually easy to do because it happens so subtly. Satan is usually pretty subtle isn't he? Here's how it often happens. Usually, Christian women start off with their heart in the right place: wanting to educate their children because they feel God's leading to do this and because they want to bring their children up in the way he should go. But somewhere along the way, in the midst of diaper changes and scrubbing toilets, that mommy gets tired and worn out. Before you know it, she loses sight of the fact that she is supposed to be serving her Lord by serving her family, NOT serving her family by serving the Lord. The difference is easy to miss if you are not paying attention yet, it is a profound and very important difference! If we are to serve our Lord without a hint of idolatry, we must not lose sight of Him as we walk along that worn path of day to day life.

It is so easy, as we wipe noses, change diapers, fold laundry, cook, clean, chauffeur, and kiss boo-boo's, to lose sight of whom we are really serving!

The good news is we can avoid this trap (a subtle trap-scenario that would completely make sense in the book The Screwtape Letters)!

We must seek daily to renew our minds (Ps. 51:10, Rom.12:2) in order guard against the sneaky sign of making our ministry to our families our idols.
Pray without ceasing, that God will help you to serve Him and protect you for that evil sin of idolatry.
Write out your goal for homeschooling, and then read it often to remind you it's all about Him.

You'll be a better Christian mommy if your focus in on the right person. Lead your kids to Jesus by following Him before.

2011-09-05T20:12:00.000-07:00

So my two oldest kids are in Florida with their grandparents leaving me with my 5 youngest children. What a blessing! I'm loving my time with these little ones, and it's been surprisingly peaceful. I had no idea how much the older kids contributed to the disputes around here!

Jessica got her hair cut! Her hair went all the way to her hiney, and it could get messy when she sat on the potty if she looked up like little girls tend to do when they are bored on the potty~ewwww! So now she has an adorable bob and looks like Dora the Explorer to me. What do you think?

I've not got the reading done that I intended to this summer and that's a bummer, because now I need to be planning the new school year. I'm really not ready for that, mentally speaking. Most of the kids have continued to do school work all summer due to unfinished school work from the previous school year. We've also been doing standardized testing this past week and we're not even done with that yet! I used to have all of my next school year planned by March of the previous school year. Don't hate me. Then I was blessed with 3 more children, bringing the total up to 7. My schedule has never been the same since.

We enjoyed a staycation a couple of weeks ago! We had so much fun and it was much less expensive than going off.

We went to Six Flags over Georgia and brought a couple of the kids friends along with us.

We enjoyed floating down the Chattahoochee River on tubes, in Helen, Georgia. That was so much fun...but no pics on the river. Can't get my camera wet, now can I?

I had so much more to say but this was an old post, saved as a draft that I decided to go ahead and post and now I've forgotten it all.

Giving Up

2011-06-07T07:29:00.000-07:00

All I've posted lately is some big, sappy blogs, lol. Bear with me for one more. My description of this blog includes it being my therapy. I was half-joking when I said that, but today, I'm half-serious!

I think finding freedom in life requires that one continuously learn how to give up. Giving up things. Giving up people. Giving up dreams. Face it. Life requires a series of giving-up's and there is no way to avoid it. Tragedy's happen like the recent tornadoes and many people found themselves having to "give up" their homes. People die which requires loved ones to temporarily (if they are born again Christians it's temporary) give them up.

Now while all of this could be a bad thing, I'm convinced that it's actually the best thing for a Christian to learn. Maybe even one of the keys to happiness? The past couple of weeks I've begun to really gain some freedom from bondage that only is coming as a result of giving up. As I begun to plan our school year, last year I cried. I cried all the time. You see, I knew that I was about to lose something...and someone. This was my last year homeschooling my oldest son and I knew he was about to embark upon life as an adult. He's on the threshold looking back at his nest, almost ready to leap and fly. So I cried a lot. And worried about whether I taught him enough and wondered if I needed Prozac to get me through this.

The thought has occurred to me that the reason I've felt so much anxiety is because I haven't learned the art of Giving Up. I've had "dreams" that if God had granted them, they would have ended in disaster most likely. I've had to learn to give those up. I've had "things" that cluttered my life and drew me away from God. God said give them up. The truth is there are things that God never intended to be mine. My kids are one of those things. The truth is they do not belong to me. They belong to God! Always have.

The Lord and I have wrestled about this, this year. And I can't believe how much peace it has brought me to "Give Up" to God.

I'd wish I could say this is the only thing I've ever wrestled with God about but it's not. I've found that in my life, it's not "dead" to oneself...it's a constant "dying" to oneself that I have to do. You see, most of the time, I do not even realize that I'm trying to hang on to...control....the things in my life, until I'm faced with changes that I can't control. Once I'm faced with that, I then realize that I have been trying to hang on to some things God wants me to give up. These are the lessons that the Lord is teaching me.

I want to give up every area of my life, to my sovereign God. I can trust Him. I choose to trust Him.

And when he had called the people unto him with his disciples also, he said unto them, Whosoever will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me. For whosoever will save his life shall lose it; but whosoever shall lose his life for my sake and the gospel's, the same shall save it.
(Mark 8:34-35)

Life in fast forward

2011-05-09T07:51:00.000-07:00

Well life happens! I'm still trying to catch my breath:)

@Craig, thank you kind sir. I'm usually not big on poetry of any kind but this one was a nice reminder. Anne Voskamp actually made me look differently at poetry, with her heart melting, poetic words, lol.

Where have I been? Learning what it means to let go of "me". My oldest son is about to graduate and I've been learning what it means to watch yourself lose something of yourself...and finding out how to replace it with something....better.

Michael went to his prom with his girlfriend a couple of weeks ago. I didn't even cry. I was happy for him, though I was NOT a fan of this homeschool prom who's theme was "Casino Royale". I'm staunch. I'm black and white. Gambling bad ergo casino theme bad. However, there was no gambling there. Just decor with cards and dice. That's not even a good decor for a prom from a secular view, in my opinion. He looked quite handsome and his date was beautiful. I was seeing his picture pop on facebook at the prom. I was so pleased to see him dancing so appropriately with her. He behaved very gentlemanly with her. The other week, one of the leaders at our high school co-op stopped me to tell me that she had walked in on Michael with his girlfriend several times and they were ALWAYS behaving appropriately. She pointed out that she had never caught them showing PDA (public displays of affection). This blessed my heart!

He also took his SAT for his second time. I did well on his SAT the first time in the Reading and Essay portion, but his math was not so great. He's now finished Algebra 2, so he thinks he's made a much better score this time around in his math portion.

He has his graduation ceremony on May 27th but he is not finished with his schooling yet. He will have to work all summer in order to finish and he have to start school next spring seeing as he's probably going to miss the cut off time to apply to go to college. He's looking at many different colleges, but would like to attend a Christian college for at least a year or two. I'm encouraging that. What would it profit him to gain an education but to lose his own soul to sin or foolishness in the process?

Speaking of graduation, we wrote him a letter that will be read during his graduation ceremony. Want to see it? Here is a sneak peak:
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Almost 18 years ago, you came into our lives and we had no idea what we were in for! As young inexperienced parents when we first held you we didn't know all the late nights, emergency room visits, and times we'd have to discipline you. We had NO idea home many tears we'd shed or prayers we'd pray for our little boy when we first looked into your adorable little face.

We also had no idea how much joy you'd bring us! We didn't realize how much fun or how smart you'd be. We had no idea how deeply philosophical you'd be. We really had no idea that you would develop such strong convictions, though we hoped you would. You did not dissappoint us. We are so very, very proud of you for the young man that you have become and for the young man we see you developing into. But nothing makes us more proud, or do we consider more important than when you gave your life to the Lord. What would it profit you, if you gained the whole world and lost your own soul?

Michael, you are reaching an exciting stage in your life! You have achieved a big step in God's plan for your life but there is so much more in store for you! We look forward to seeing you grow in the Lord as you attend college. And we cannot wait to see how you will serve the Lord with your life as an adult!

While we have your undivided attention, let us offer you just a bit more of unsolicited parental advice. Whether you succeed in life according to men does not matter. Whether you finish college, ultimately, does not matter. The only thing that really matters is this: That you love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, mind and strength and that you love your neighbor as yourself. God will never ask you how much you earned, how big your house was, or what kind of car you drove. All that will really matter...all that will really make you a success is whether you loved Him and other's as He commanded you to.

The LORD bless you, and keep you; The LORD make His face shine on you, And be gracious to you; The LORD lift up His countenance on you, And give you peace.
Congratulations Michael on your achievment!
Love Mom and Dad

An Ideal Christian Family

2011-03-27T18:05:00.000-07:00

In an ideal Christian family....

Christ is given first place.
Happiness prevails.
Rejoicing is heard instead of complaints.
Interruptions don't destroy family peace.
Storms strengthen a family's love.
Tears and disappointments are shared openly.
In difficult times, everyone is drawn closer to God.
A visitor always feels welcome.
Needs of others come before our own needs.

Fussing is not heard.
A time of separation does not sever strong family ties.
Money is kept in proper perspective.
Interest is shown equally in every family member.
Love covers the faults in others.
Young people respect and obey their parents.
~Shirley Baker
February 4, 1992

Daughters, Modesty and Why I Think People have Lost Their Common Sense

2011-03-27T09:01:00.000-07:00

"The fashion industry does not care that what they are creating and marketing creates significant emotional disorders in our daughters. They care only about the bottom line. The bottom line is that tweens are a lucrative demographic, commanding about $43 billion of spending power nationwide. Girls 8-12 spend about $500 million a year on beauty products alone. (Mascara and eye liner sales doubled in this age range last year.) When Abercrombie released their thong underwear in 2002, they felt it in the bottom line because moms like us raised the awareness of the problem and spoke to them with their pocket books. We have to speak again. ~ Pure Freedom"

I went to co-op Thursday. Our conservative, Christian, homeschool co-op. I'm the assistant in a class for 2nd/3rd graders. Then I noticed "it". A little girl in the class had a full face of make up. Did you notice I'm in a 2nd/3rd grade class? Lipstick, blush, eyeliner, mascara and base. She said she put it on in the car. I have to admit that I was surprised.

Sometimes I feel like I'm the only person in my county that thinks our daughters need protected from this sort of thing.

Our daughters are becoming "sexualized" earlier and earlier. We see the ramifications of this all the time. Girls are growing breasts earlier. More are getting pregnant, earlier. They are starting their periods earlier. I'll never forget the 5 year old at church who was always in 2inch heels, lips saturated in lip gloss and carried her Lady Gaga CD cover with her everywhere, who gave me a 5 minute speech about a boy she knew who was "mean" but "so sexy. I mean SO sexy!" etc. This ought to alarm us when a child is referring to another kindergartener as having qualities as pertain to sex.

Today I read a story about Abercrombie now selling padded push-up bikini tops for 8 year olds. They got some flak for calling them "push-up" so they changed the name (and really, what are they going to "push-up" anyhow???). Then there's this other article that nails this topic and asks a very pertinent question~ Why do we let girls dress like that [in an overly sexualized way...or as the article calls it, "like prostitutes"]? Good question.

Throw out my religious beliefs for a moment. Is this what modern, liberated feminists were fighting for? The right to dress how they want...and to *want* to be seen as valuable only if you look a certain way? The right to be a complete strangers eye candy? To look "sexy" for some man that could care less about anything you think? In all fairness, maybe he would care about your thoughts, opinions and intelligence if he could concentrate on your thoughts, but honestly...you breasts are just too distracting. (And don't even use that "It's his responsibility to control his thoughts" argument. If a woman didn't want a man/woman oogling her breasts, she'd cover them up, right?) Is this how modern feminism was supposed to benefit women?

No thank you. I think I'll pass on teaching my daughter's about their "right" to be some man's sexual fantasy and be ignored intellectually.

Mommy's and Daddy's~ be your daughters protector and parent. Not their sexualization overseer. Teach them to respect them self and to value their bodies, morals and intellect more than they value a males sexual response to them. Teach them that their sexuality is wonderful and they ought to protect it and give it out only to someone very special. Someone committed to them for life. Someone who will love them like the Christ loves the church and would give his life for her.

And really... all you need is common sense to realize that if you allow your daughter dress in an overly sexual way, especially at a young age, you are teaching them that their breasts/butt/sex is the most important thing about them. Common sense.

How To Handle a Teen-age Spiritual Crisis

2011-03-14T21:13:00.000-07:00

All of our children are on a spiritual journey, that only they can walk. We cannot "believe" for them nor can we force "faith". That is something that only they and God can accomplish. However, I'm a firm believer that, as my child's mother, I can help provide much needed guidance and protection from the evil one, whose only desire concerning my child is to kill, steal and destroy.

Right now, my oldest son is going through a spiritual battle that I can only describe as "rough". What began as some questions about marriage has now evolved into a full fledged spiritual crisis. He's brought up what he thinks is an apparent contradiction in the Bible, and he's floundering as he tries to make sense of it all.

He's not the first boy-on-the-verge-of-manhood to experience a spiritual crisis of this magnitude. I'm well aware of the evil one's plan. God's word spells it out clearly. We have been forewarned! But I thank God, He did not stop there! He also gave me a plan.

Ephesians 6:13 Wherefore take unto you the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand.

Ephesians 6:18 Praying always with all prayer and supplication in the Spirit, and watching thereunto with all perseverance and supplication for all saints;

Ephesians 6 outlines exactly who the enemy is and how I can battle him. This passage of scripture tells me to put on the Armor of God. For head-to-head battle with the devil, I need head-to-toe armor. The Word of God is my sword. Faith is my shield. Prayer is how I will handle the weapon God has given. Satan will not get my son without a battle!

I'm also more aware than EVER that my son is vulnerable right now. His struggle here can be the foothold that the devil wants. When you or your child is struggling spiritually, this is definitely NOT the time to let your guard down and allow ungodly movies, music, books, attitudes or friends into their life. I may as well be injecting satan's thoughts directly into his heart when his heart is at its weakest.

I refuse to back down, let up, roll over or give up. The good thing about every spiritual battle is this: Once you have come through it and overcome that battle, you are always stronger spiritually for it. If you are not stronger spiritually, than you are not done with the battle.

I'm on the warpath. I'm fighting as if my son's soul hangs in the balance. Because~it does.

Succombing to Worry

2011-03-08T15:32:00.000-08:00

Do you ever have a time, when you totally keep second guessing something you have done and worry it wasn't the right thing? I've been feeling this way ever since the other day when I talked to Joshua about his birth family. If you think about it, please say a prayer for my sweet boy. And me. I need more wisdom.


Lots of stuff going on in his little heart and mind. Father, give me wisdom in knowing what to say that will draw him to You.

Joshua's first visit with his therapist is March 18th. Hopefully, he'll be able to reassure me that I haven't totally messed things up by my talk with Josh. Or at least, hopefully, he'll be able to reassure me that no permanent damage has been done. Sigh.

Being a Mom is tough.

Multitude Monday: 1000 Gifts #556 - 570

2011-03-07T13:00:00.000-08:00

556 - red exercise ball
557 - new journal found that invites deep thoughts during Bible study
558 - Timmy's chat's
559 - Timmy's lovey hugs and his always needing to physically feel the presence of his family~ such a touchy feely kid!
560 - power point
561 - memories captured in photographs that predate my oldest son's birth ~ brings this mama to tears as I search for photographs for our "Graduating Senior" power point presentation
562 - hands raised in praise when we worship together
563 - Lily Grace and Jonathan
564 - encouraging words from friends
565 - new tile in kids bathroom and husband who made it happen
566 - last nights sermon on the practice of offering the sacrifice of Thanks
567 - blood donors
568 - Voice of the Martyrs
569 - My almost man-son desiring to have a Bible verse engraved on his class ring.
570 - dear comments on this blog to bless me

Adoption is Not Easy, Pt 3 : My Son is Hurting

2011-03-05T17:34:00.000-08:00

So now I get to the part of the story where the movies would portray Josh as being won over by our unselfish love and undying persistence at parenting exactly the way he needs. Our wisdom would, in fact, be so great I would just instinctively know exactly what he needs, what to say, how to answer his questions, etc. And of course, the answers that I give would bring Joshua, Jessica and Hannah complete peace and they would move forward with their lives with little to no issues stemming from their early traumatic life.

Enter: Reality.

Joshua and Jessica both have questions. There are no easy answers. And certainly none that leaves them feeling "at peace" with the whole situation. Well, at least not for Joshua. Jessica is very happy and well adjusted. Josh struggles.

Joshua and I had a very hard conversation this past week. For the past 3 years I've struggled with knowing whether this new kid of mine was depressed or just solemn. Not having had him since birth and not knowing what he is like other than what he's shown me here at my home, it's difficult to gauge what is "his personality" as opposed to what is genuine "depression". After our conversation this past week, I'm convinced he's depressed.

Our conversation began with me making a casual comment to him that he seemed sad to me. He told me that he was sad because he misses his birth mom a lot. Our conversation continued with me saying he seemed sad quite often. He admitted he was. He said he often fantasizes that his birth parents are here with him. He also admitted that sometimes when he's sad, he goes into his room to be alone and when he finally comes out, he often wants to just go right back in there because he's so sad.

At one point, Josh said he was still thinking about his foster family he lived with before us and how he went turkey hunting with the foster dad and got to pick a carrot right out of the ground.

When I asked Joshua why he was sad, one of the reasons he told me was because his parents were all alone and sad because they weren't with him. This was one of the things his birth mother told him right before the visits were ended. While I understand why she said it and I don't think understood the ramifications this would have on her children. They worried about their birth mom being sad from that time forward. I think Jessica no longer worries about that....Joshua obviously still struggles.

So this is when I decided to have the hard conversation with Joshua that I hope was the right thing to do. I told Joshua his parents are not real sad about them not being at home and they are certainly not alone. And I told him the truth about why I believed that; they were going to parties right before we adopted them and they were doing drugs there at the parties. (I realize that many who do drugs are depressed, but apparently she was not so depressed that she couldn't still party.)

Often when children are adopted from foster care, especially when they are having trouble bonding, they will continue to think about the kind of parents they'd like to have. I told him that he was still "parent shopping" and he needed to stop that. We don't turkey hunt, deer hunt or any other kind of hunting (except for my keys, lol). We don't have time to hunt! But WE are the parents that God placed him with as a 2nd family. We are God's FIRST choice for a second family:) That means that God has a plan for him within our family and he needs to embrace that. I don't for one minute think Joshua would really choose to be adopted by another family if he had a choice. He is bonded (though not as much as I'd like) and I have no doubt that he loves us. But fantasizing about other families will only make him less content about the situation he's in. And let's face it: If he's to be happy here, he must learn to happy with what he's got....material wise, family wise, and parents wise.

I asked Joshua if he feels like he is being disloyal to his parents if he allows himself to love us or be happy here. And his answer was "sort of". So to this, I told him he needed to give himself permission to be happy. His parents were not going to be any happier because he was sad and his mom was moving on with her life.

The last thing I told him was the hardest, but my reason for telling him such harsh stuff is because he's not seeing reality for what it is and he's depressed because of it. I have to admit this is the hardest part. I didn't want to ever say a single bad thing about them. I wanted for him to draw his own natural conclusions about the entire situation, while simultaneously forgiving them, and coming to peace with us being his 2nd parents. Yes, that was my fantasy. Enter: Reality's mean relative named "Reality Check". I see him suffering due to his own fantasies and own misunderstanding of the situation. Sometimes a person can't see reality for what it is without the help of someone else. So,the last part of my reality check was to tell him that his parents made choices that were bad for them but also for HIM. I told him that they could have chosen to not do drugs, but they didn't. I told him that if they had chosen to quit doing drugs, he would have went back home to them but they didn't. I told him over and over I love his parents and pray for them. I reminded him frequently that we all make wrong choices and that no one is perfect. But I reminded him frequently that his sadness is natural but it's okay to love us both and be happy. I reminded him that NONE of this is his fault.

I have to admit, I'm not so sure this was the right thing to do even if it is the truth. I do not buy the whole, "addiction is a disease". Even if it is a "disease" and I don't think it is, it is a disease that the addicted person chooses. He's been living with these fantasies, false ideas and depression for 3 years. If your child's wrong ideas are making them depressed, how do you not try to help them face reality? Still, I hope I did the right thing.

He has went to 2 different counselors before now and they both focused on his behavior and then said he didn't need counseling. I knew something was not right with Josh but wasn't sure what it was. Joshua didn't like going anyhow and said he didn't want to go to the "talking doctors" when I took him before.

The bottom line? Joshua told me he didn't want to be sad anymore but he didn't know how to quit being sad. And he told me wanted to go to a "talking doctor" to help him learn how to quit being sad. And this time, he asked for a male "talking doctor".

So maybe the talk was a good thing.

Adoption Is Not Easy, Part 2

2011-03-02T08:09:00.000-08:00

*Disclaimer~I rarely do much editing till after I publish...and even then its sporadic. Sometimes I add stuff later, and then realize I already said that. Please forgive these discrepancies.

I previously told the beginning of our story here of how I came to adopt Joshua, Jessica, and Hannah. So if you want to read the background to this story, I'd highly recommend it.

Adoptions are never easy, and rarely fairytale-ish. It always involves loss. The birth mother and father almost always suffer grief as they "lose" their child, whether it's a voluntary relinquishment or a forced termination of parental rights. And my son is still suffering from adoption. I have said a hundred times to people who don't understand his grief since he already has a "great" adoptive family (and incidentally, we're just a normal family...nothing real special about us!),"Josh's family had problems, but everyone has some loved one in their family who has 'problems' but we all love them any how. Joshua is no different. He loves his birth parents and knows they gave him life. He mourns the loss of his natural bond with his birth mother." If I had been taken as a child from my family, and told "Your father is an alcoholic and he's abusive (this is true). Your mom is not protecting you the way WE think she should. So here is a new family. This is your "new" mom and dad. They love you! So forget about your old parents and embrace your new family.", I'd have told you, YOU'RE CRAZY. Good, bad, or ugly, I loved BOTH of my parents and I would not have embraced a new family easily. Often, all you hear about concerning adoption is the idealized adoption stories that are out there, but they do not always give a true and accurate vision of what it's like for so many kids.

When Joshua and his sisters were brought into foster care their birth family obviously had some problems. Their mother was addicted to Meth and various prescription drugs. Their home was considered "unfit" because of the filth. They had no electricity or water. Their dad was often away working, but he couldn't keep a steady job and they moved constantly. Their relatives had gotten tired of their antics and had severed all ties with them. So when DFACS stepped in, the baby was only 10 days old, Jessica was 2 and Joshua was 4. Josh was still not potty trained and he could not talk discernibly. My husband and I were only doing "respite" or short term foster care at the time because my mother-in-law had cancer and lived several hours away. We wanted to be free to leave the state to go see her or help when needed. DFACS asked us if we'd be willing to keep these little ones for a few days while they prepared to move them to their "permanent" foster family. We agreed. We were the first family that they came to when they entered foster care. I thank God that I took pictures during this time and got a few pictures of each of them. I was exhausted due to rocking my poor babies to sleep as they cried, missing their birth mommy. Jessica was old enough to understand that she wasn't "home" but not old enough to really talk to. Joshua couldn't even communicate with us and really didn't know what was going on. Hannah was the only one who took it in stride and she (obvious to me) had some severe tummy issues from her formula intolerance (something that the caseworkers refused to listen to me about...they insisted her horrible rash was from "neglect" in changing her diaper. Turned out that I was right! Hannah had to be put on a special formula and Zantac for acid reflux after she left my home) I *almost* decided to get quit doing foster care all together after they left because I was SO upset about not being able to help them understand or lessen their fear. Jessica was fearful of everyone except me and Sarah. Josh was aloof but obviously nervous. It was painful to watch as a human and as their foster parents. They left my home in just 4 short days....something I've always regretted.

A year later, my mother-in-law had passed away and our home was empty of foster children. Then we got the call. Read the background on that in the previous story! It was amazing to see how God worked things out! Josh came to live with me on May 20, 2008 as a foster-to-adopt child. I cried buckets of tears out of joy and gratefulness to the Lord for answering my prayers so directly. But still, I knew that "foster-to-adopt" means "high risk" placement. It means that the parents still have their rights but that the parents have had over a year to meet the requirements of DFACS to get their children back. They had not accomplished their goals in the amount of time that they had been given, one year. So foster-to-adopt means that the parents are in danger of losing their rights, in which case the children would be free for adoption and need a "forever family". The state then works simultaneously on both reunification with birth family AND on finding them an adoptive family.

I was thrilled to have these new blessings under my roof but still, my heart was sad for Joshua from day one. He would ask me, "How much longer before I can go home?" I would always tell him I didn't know but we could pray for it. He didn't believe in prayer. Or God. He said God wasn't real but still he would pray...just in case. He'd tell me, "My mama has to work hard and then I can go home." He always thought ultimately, he'd go home to be with his birth parents.

As the case progressed, the parents seemed to be doing somewhat well. His birth mom had been staying clean for while and they were in a home that she was keeping clean (one of the requirements of them going home). The dad was working steadily out of town. He didn't come to visits. He wasn't fulfilling the drug testing requirements, but he'd not tested positive for drugs at all when he had been tested. DFACS was kind of overlooking this because they were doing well over all.

I felt so bad for him that I prayed that his birth parents would "get it right". I prayed that God would save them and help them conquer their problems. I prayed for Joshua so hard. He'd already suffered so much. From the time he entered our home the first time, he was in 4 different foster homes before he came back to ours, permanently. For an entire year, he was moved from home to home! No wonder he wanted to go back to his birth parents!

I was so in love with these kids, I wanted their birth family to "get it right" so their children could come home...for the children's sake. But one day, I got a call from their caseworker, and she said that their mom had tested positive for cocaine. She was livid and said she was done with them. She was pursuing a TPR (termination of parental rights). She said, "I was going to return these kids in less than a month and they blew it." At this point, my heart was turning back flips. I loved these children dearly. God had answered every prayer I'd had. I knew this and had recognized the incredible way God had answered my prayers. But after getting these sweet children, I hoped that God would make the parents stay clean, get saved and be safe so they could have their "happily ever after". God knew when He placed them with me what would happen. Not of this took Him by surprise. He had a plan for Joshua and it included us. I cried because I was thrilled to hear they'd be mine for ever. But I cried even more because I knew how sad Josh would be. I cried for their birth mother, because I knew how hard this would be on her too. No one wakes up one day and says, "I think I'll get addicted to drugs today."

If there was one thing I wish I knew it's how to eliminate the abuse of drugs and alcohol in this country. It's destroying millions of people here in the USA. Kids are suffering. Parents are suffering. The kicker is that the selfish cling to their "right" to smoke marijuana legally. They cling to their "right" to drink alcohol legally, even while pregnant. As a nation we need to wake up. We need Jesus. What am I doing to be a light in the world...to bring Jesus to this nation full of people on their way to hell?

Adoption is not easy...

2011-03-01T07:59:00.000-08:00

My sweet boy made some confessions to me after I was pretty hard today in giving him the facts. It may seem harsh to many who are not in our situation but I did what I thought best for Josh. Today, I'm remembering our story. The story of how he came to be my son.

We adopted Joshua, April 30, 2009. He had been with me for about 11 months when his adoption, along with his 2 sisters, was finalized. Josh had always made it clear to me that he wanted to go back home to his birth parents. But there was never any doubts whether he was supposed to be with me. You see, my husband and I had been a foster parent for a few years and we had initially gotten into foster care with belief that God wanted me and my husband to adopt. After awhile of doing straight foster care, we realized that we needed to change our license to a "foster-to-adopt" license because fostering was taking far too much energy and time for this home schooling mama. So we told them to change our license over. And then we waited. For an entire year, we waited for them to change our license, all to no avail. I emailed. I called. I talked to them in person. But no updates were done. In the meantime, I read an article in The Voice of the Martyr's magazine about some horrible persecution that occurred to some Christians in Chiapas, Mexico. I felt so burdened for them knowing that millions of Mexican's were fleeing their country for one reason or another and coming into our country. The Lord said to me, "See? I'm bringing the mission field right here to the USA". Then I had another thought. What if we adopted children who were from, or descendants of people from, Chiapas? What if we were able to help children who didn't have families who could...or would take care of them? So that became my prayer...that I would be able to adopt children from Chiapas. Next, the Lord burdened me for a sibling group. I knew that many children who were brought into foster care were separated because often families don't want several children at once! So I began to pray for a sibling group. So then I began to think about my birth children. I have 3 birth sons and 1 birth daughter. I needed more girls! But boys are harder to place. Everyone wants a girl...boys have to wait longer....sometimes forever if they have problems. So that did it. I began to pray for 2 girls and a boy. I prayed for months. Finally, on May 19, 2008, I realized something. I was happy with my 4 birth children. I didn't feel like I had to have more kids and I was beginning to doubt that this was what God wanted for me. Maybe I was just mixing up what I wanted for what He wanted. So on May 19, I prayed a simple prayer completely surrendered to whatever the outcome was that God had in mind for us:

"Father, I love the family you've given me! I feel blessed beyond measure. I really like that they are getting a bit older too, so we can do more stuff with them. But Father, I've always wanted to adopt and I always thought You wanted me to do this. Maybe I didn't understand? Maybe I was getting ahead of myself and calling it "Your will". I don't want that! I only want to do Your will! So Father, I'm asking you right now to show me clearly what Your will is. If you want us to proceed with trying to adopt, I'm asking that you move the hearts of the people at DFACS to either update our license or for them to call with the children that YOU want us to adopt this week. And Lord, I would really prefer to just have the kids if possible so we can just get on with our lives. And Lord, do you remember those children who stayed with use 4 days about a year ago? If they are still in foster care and need an adoptive family AND YOU WANT US TO ADOPT THEM, well....that'd be just fine with me."

May 20, 2008, Judy M. called from DFACS and asked me if I were interested in 2 girls, ages 1 and 3, as a foster-to-adopt placement. That's all the info I got at first. A few minutes later she noticed they also had a brother. I quickly called my husband...overwhelmed and in tears at how quickly God had answered my prayer. He agreed and so I called her back. They brought my children to my home a few hours later and they've been here ever since.

Prayer answered: They were the children that had spent 4 days in my home when they first came into foster care.
Prayer answered: They were of Mexican descent, though I don't know from what region in Mexico. Until God shows me otherwise, I will believe that this was another direct answer to prayer and they are from Chiapas.
Prayer answered: They are 2 girls and a boy.
Prayer answered:They were brought to me the day after I prayed, "Not my will but thine". I dared to lay out my fleece before God, giving Him a timetable so that I could know His will and He dared to answer that prayer and reveal His will.

The rest of our adoption story will be continued in the next post.

Multitude Monday: 1000 Gifts # 541 - 555

2011-02-27T20:57:00.000-08:00

I've begun the book. The first page surprises me. True to Ann's style, the very first page draws me in and I immediately begin to relate. This book, I just know, is what I need and I can't wait to learn all that God has in store for me, through the words of this book.

541 - My husbands gift to me, this book that was such a surprise.
542 - bathroom floor complete thanks to husbands hard work (and willingness to suffer with his hurt back) and his helpers

Next project: Get rid of ugly wallpaper!

543 - another new book that the church ordered for us, the body: Radical by David Platt
544 - butterflies

545 - time with friends
546 - well behaved children
547 - precious little doggy-sized pony

548 - spinning, twirling ballerinas

549 - open windows that blow in the promise of spring...
550 - coke
551 - wonder

552 and 553 - beautiful gardens full of His handiwork and color!

554 - smiling faces

555 - home given haircut that turned out good!

Before haircut

before haircut

After haircut ♥

After haircut

Handsome boy!

Trendy Christianity

2011-02-20T13:17:00.000-08:00

I've noticed a trend amongst certain Christians. I don't think it's a new trend though because you read about others who followed this "trend", even in the Bible. In fact, I think it's the oldest trend on earth.

When that sly serpent tickled Eve's ear with his split tongue, he whispered this trend into our world's existence; Hissed out~interpret God's word the way you want it to be....

And we are still listening to him, the evil one. We, the nation called The United States of America, are counted as the most religious, Christian nation in the world. Yet, according to a recent Barna study, the the majority of Christians in the "most Christian nation in the world", don't believe God's word is truth. They believe that truth is relative to the person. That's his lies. We reinterpret truth in order to fit our ideas of what we want "truth" to be.

We hear the evil one speaking on TV. Only he's dressed in a suit and tie, or sometimes just regular clothes. And he presumes to speak for God, interpreting His "truth" as, "Give to me and God will bless you financially to overflowing!". Or sometimes the evil one speaks other "interpretations" of God's Holy Words, saying "You don't have change...come as you...stay as you are....just come to church, be 'blessed'...and leave feeling happy about yourself". Is this really what God's word teaches? Or is this some more trendy Christianity...reinterpretations of His Holiness?

We must live by the Word alone, The Bread of God (Matt 4:4). We must know how to fight his lies (Eph 6 is a good starting place clue). We must know His words so we can fight his, the evil ones, lies. We must reject trendy Christianity, and watch, pray and live on His words, for these Words bring life. The evil ones words always lead to death.

Why I Don't Need Flowers, Cards or Dinners on the "Day" of Love

2011-02-14T13:49:00.000-08:00

This year I will probably not get any flowers, a card or a special dinner from my husband. He probably wouldn't even know it was Valentines Day, except for the fact that I baked a Red Velvet Cake, spaghetti and meatballs w/pasta, red sauce with ground beef, and Alfredo Sauce in case he's in the mood for white sauce. He probably wouldn't remember that every year I have a tradition of getting everyone to write down at least 1 thing that they like or love about each member of the family, so we can read it and be blessed by each other at the dinner table. This year my husband will probably spend a large part of the evening at the soccer field with our soccer playing teen instead of doting on me, romancing me. And this year, there will be no disappointment in Valentines Day.

You see, my husband teases a lot saying, "I don't need a special holiday to show you love because every day is Valentines day with me!" But in seriousness, he's exactly right. He shows me love every. single .day. He shows me love by digging up the back yard by hand, with a hurt back so he can fix our plumbing. Or when he spends hours of his free time laying down these tiles in the bathroom so I can have a nice, carpet-free bathroom. He showed me love when he took his bonus check, and instead of selfishly spending it on himself (like I know of sooooo many men doing), he a refrigerator because ours broke down. He was dripping with romance when he recently went out and bought me a dishwasher because ours was almost broken down and I declared rather dramatically, "I can live without a stove before I can live without a dishwasher!"

This man of mine...he's beyond anything that I ever expected. He has more patience and forgiveness with me, than what he should have to. How many times has he forgiven me? 70 times 7? That's not a drop in the bucket.

Oh, and there is nothing sexier than a husband who is going to college, has 7 kids, pastor's and works full time, AND goes to the soccer fields with his teen son on Valentines Day. I couldn't possibly be disappointed in today...my heart is bursting with love for this man because of how he loves me 365 days a year.

Picture snapped by my soccer playing teen.

Multitude Monday: 1000 Gifts # 541 - 559

2011-02-13T19:23:00.000-08:00

I'm joining Ann in counting my graces at...

541 - Friday night pizza
542 - husbands gift of a personal pan pizza...just the way I like it:)
543 - freshly vacuumed floors
544 - Jessica's long, dark hair~such a joy to brush and fix

545 - Yummy spices
546 - lingering Sunday afternoons
547 - freshly folded laundry in the drawers
548 - physical energy
549 - health: God keeping me well while all the kids were sick (I think this was on my list last week but I'm just sooo grateful to God for hearing my prayer for strength and health

550 - Joshua's bravery and God helping him as he got his blood taken this week
551 - Anne's blog and her words of wisdom on parenting~ so refreshing to me this past week and renewed my spirit to keep on keeping on!
552 - quiet
553 - God's gentle patience with me~the slow learner
555- The promise of forgiveness if I will confess
556 - The Ministry of Motherhood by Sally Clarkson
557 - a R.A.K=random act of kindness by a stranger. Paid my grocery bill of $55 tonight after I accidentally left my wallet at home.

558 - sweet valentines from my precious children
559 - love

Pictures of the Week

2011-02-12T16:09:00.000-08:00

One of the things I want to do with this blog is to post memories captured on camera and post them. It's kind of like an online scrapbook for me really. I love photography and one day, when I grow up (haha) I would love to be a photographer. I also love looking at other peoples photography...professional photographer or amateur alike. Maybe others are like me in this love for photography? So I decided to join a link up this week at an ordinary mom, because I thought someone else may enjoy the peak into our life as much as I enjoy peaking into theirs:)

We made a homemade hairbow last Saturday to match Sarah's dress.

The carefreeness of childhood!

Timmy is enjoying his ice cream Sundae cone.

Hannah's ice cream without the cone! She's gluten-intolerant, but who's missing it when your ice cream looks this good?

Josh had to copy Timmy...cause he just thinks Timmy is the best, smartest big brother ever:)

Jessica thought Timmy and Josh's looked so fun, she wanted the same thing!

They look like the cat that ate the canary...or maybe like kids eating ice cream with the works!

Hannah was very happy with her ice cream:)

If you could have seen HIS bowl of ice cream, you'd wonder where this skinny kid put it all! Right after that, he told me he didn't eat much ice cream because he was wanting to eat a big dinner....so, "What's for dinner?" he asked. LOL.

Lego Link Up

2011-02-11T17:14:00.000-08:00

I just found a new homeschooling blog that had a great link-up idea ~ a LEGO link-up! My boys just love, love, love Legos and my girls are pretty fond of them also. So, thank you to The Joys of Home Educating, for coming up with this cute idea!

Here's my son's Lego creation, made especially for this occasion ☺.

Timmy is 11 and he still loves Legos. He thinks that when he gets grown, he would like to build space rockets. And when he says "build" he means that he wants to be the one hammer, nailing, or screwing stuff together. When I asked him if he wanted to build it or design it, he was very certain that he wanted to build it. But between you and me, I'm thinking he'll really enjoy designing things...he really pays attention to details. For instance, notice in the photo above and below, the man in the dinosaurs mouth? Detail. It's all about the detail.

He can tell you exactly what everything on this Lego plate is, why it's there and what the story is behind it.

Cute horse, eh?

Notice the man in the tree here? He told me why the man was in the tree, but I forget. I have 7 kids and he talks a lot, okay?

Legos are a great toy for kids to play with. Real Legos are the best!

Feeling the Urge to Clean

2011-02-09T13:06:00.000-08:00

Yes, I know I'm totally jumping the gun here but let the spring cleaning commence! I'm totally feeling the urge to clean around here or more specifically, the urge to declutter.My sanity demands some decluttering☺

The hard part about decluttering for me, is that I have good stuff~stuff that I think is still quite usable and I like. But here are the cold hard facts. I don't live in a mansion, so space is pretty limited. Decorative items need to be dusted a lot more than once a year or every 2 years. The home schooling stuff that I didn't like before...when I used them...is still the same "stuff" that it was back when I stuck it on the shelf...I'm not going to magically start liking it. Craft stuff that I've had for years and haven't used has to go. The bottom line: our possessions have to fit neatly in the available space in order to have peace in our home.

So the list making begins. I'm going to try something new this time. This year, rather than try to have several big cleaning days I'm going to work for 15 minutes or half-hour each day on my spring cleaning projects. I think it may be wiser and more productive to just pace myself working on our problem areas a few minutes each day than to have several days that in the end we all wind up miserable. I'm going to start by cleaning of the tops of things around the whole house and then cleaning the rest of the room, since the "tops" are pretty out of control and cluttered here. After that, I will work one room at a time, taking my time in each room so I can do a thorough job. Here's a list of the "tops" that need cleaning:

Computer Armoire
Home School book cases
China cabinet
kitchen cabinets
refrigerator
mantle
table between recliners
all dressers

Before - Computer Armoire

This was easy...sort of. I've not done a proper dusting of the top of the armoire in a couple of years. So first, I got a basket and put everything on top of the armoire into the basket. Next, I used the vacuum hose with a brush on the end to dust the top. Then I used hot, soapy water to give it a good cleaning. After that, I dusted all the stuff in the basket and decided I didn't really want any of this up there anymore. So I repurposed some other stuff in the house to put in the empty spot so that it's less cluttered, clean and slightly decorated:) If I had one of those tall brown candle stands kind of like this or this, I'd put one of those up there. Hmmm. I'll have to watch for some sales to find one.

After ~ computer armoire. Looks a little better:)

I'm a list person, and sometimes I really enjoy making the lists myself. Today is not that day, so I went looking for some cleaning lists. Here are some links to spring cleaning pages that you may find helpful too.

Christian Homekeeper Network~ spring cleaning printables
Martha Stewarts Spring Cleaning Tips
Johnson's Right at Home premade cleaning lists

There are lots more lists that I have somewhere in my "favorites" but I don't have time to retrieve them all right now. But if these aren't quite what you are looking for google "cleaning lists" or what ever your forte is, and there are tons of websites for this stuff.

Today, I'm joining Raising Homemakers for their link-up.

When to Hate

2011-02-08T16:46:00.000-08:00

Today, I read a scripture that really convicted me and encouraged me at the same time.

"Nor shall you bring an abomination into your house, lest you be doomed to destruction like it. You shall utterly detest it and utterly abhor it, for it in an accursed thing."~Deuteronomy 7:26

Being a Christian today, in some ways~many ways~ is so much harder than it used to be. In the past, like 100 years ago or so, entertainment was hard to come by. Any entertainment to be found, the individual usually had to create for themselves or their family. When you read the Laura Ingalls Wilder series, Little House, you will see how they were entertained most nights. The family would come in after a long day's work and play. It would be dark and the family would eat their dinner. After a quick clean up, they would all sit down to do hand work like sewing around the fire, while Pa would bring out his fiddle. They would listen to Pa play the fiddle, vigorously at first and sing. Then later, he would play quieter music. Often he'd sing the girls to sleep. The only entertainment they had, was carefully chosen by Pa, or sometimes one of the girls when they had a request. None of these songs accidentally popped on, like it does on the radio. Their pioneer life left them alone as a family for much of their life as well, which meant the only real influences they had were that of their family. Entertainment had to be purposeful.

Contrast that to our culture today, and you can begin to see the problem. The TV is absentmindedly turned on and plays, often for 16 or more hours a day. The parents are busy, so they are not able to monitor what's being piped into their family room. Even if they are there watching with the children, who can help it if the families favorite show has some "sexual situations" in it right? It was only rated TV PG. And so what if the main character cusses occasionally. They're gonna hear it somewhere right? I mean unless you live under a rock, your kids and yourself HAVE to hear this stuff occasionally. Right?

The situations are endless. Today, in our culture, we've made "witches" into the heroes, vampires into our fantasies, and kids with bad attitudes our role models.

I wonder what God thinks about all of this? More importantly (for me to answer personally), I wonder what God thinks about the entertainment that I've allowed into my home? Have I invited things into my home that God calls abominable and says I should detest...utterly abhor...and called it comedy? Entertainment? Family movie night? Or even background noise a.k.a radio? How about books? They can be just as wicked and abominable to the Lord. The internet has more potential for "abominable" things than just about anything I can think of.

I need the Father's help to discern what should and should not be allowed into our home in the name of entertainment or even education. Now is not the time to grow weary in well-doing! So when should I "hate"? When something is abominable in God's eyes.

Lord, give me eyes to see the abominable things that I've grown used to. Make it stand out to me just like a clump of dirt on top of the snow. Help me to see it from Your perspective and to hate it just as You have commanded me to. In Jesus name, amen.

Multitude Monday: 1000 Gifts # 521 - 540

2011-02-07T06:08:00.000-08:00

I'm joining Ann at ...

521 - plumbing fixed
522 - hardworking husband who dug up the septic tank access and fixed the plumbing
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523 - ibuprofen
524 - not being sick while the kids were. Thank you Lord, for this gift of health!
525 - warm water to bathe in
526 - eating and serving utensils
527 - new-to-us car

528 - We had hoped to pay for the car completely, up front in cash but we were just shy of having all the money. The car dealership agreed to let us make 5 payments, interest free, to pay off the balance of the car that we just bought.
529 - laundry detergent
530 - disinfectant spray
531 - After long, wet, cold weeks~no rain!
532 - cuddle time with my sick little one. It's been a long two weeks, but it's been a precious time to get cuddles
533 - smells
534 - little scribbles of love
535 - new tile for bathroom~ nothing like waiting awhile between demo'ing and fixing to make you appreciate the "fixing"
536 - super bowl is over
538 - wonders not understood

539 - late night talks
540 - leftovers

My Daughter's Blog

2011-02-04T11:20:00.000-08:00

My sweet Sarah has started a blog, as a homeschool project. She's going to post several things each week to improve her communication skills, writing skills, computer skills, and to help her spiritually by blogging about what she's learning from the Lord, and her homemaking skills as she blogs about what she's learning in that arena also.

If any of you know of other little girls that have a blog similar to this, I'd love for you to tell me about it so I can pass them along to Sarah! Wouldn't it be fun if the girls could start their own community?(closely supervised by over-protective parents such as myself of course. So IF you happen to be a pervert, FYI, my child is not allowed to even check comments about her blog so look elsewhere AND I will report anything REMOTELY suspicious, I'll report you to the National Center for Exploited Children....AND we will disable all right-clicking so you can't take her photo's).

Check out Sarah's blog: Christian Girlz.

Recipe: Taco Soup

2011-02-03T15:59:00.000-08:00

I am surrounded by a house full of sick people. It's cold and rainy. There are fevers, croupy coughs and shivering little ones all around me. Even my husband feels bad. Since his wreck, he's had a nerve problem in his back and it's causing his right foot to stay cold all the time! This is the perfect night for soup. Usually, I would make chicken soup for my sick family but tonight, since we had chicken last night, I decided to make this super simple, flavorful, and super FAST soup that I got from Southern Plate.

You are going to need kidney beans, corn, tomato sauce, Rotel tomatoes, onion, ground beef, ranch dressing mix, and a taco seasoning mix. The ingredients above is DOUBLED because we are feeding a small army here. I'm hoping for leftovers ☺.

First, chop those onions finely. I used my mandolin food grater to do it and it made it easy...and no crying:)

Next, brown your ground beef with your onions. I waited till the ground beef was about half done to add the onions. *Drain the ground beef when it is done!

Next, dump in the rest of the ingredients plus your water (not shown in original picture).
Bring to a boil and simmer for 15 minutes.

It's soooo good with a little cheese and sour cream!

Taco Soup (remember the ingredients above are for a doubled recipe!)

1 lb ground beef

1 Lg chopped onion, cooked with beef

2 cans kidney beans

1 can corn

1- 15oz can Ro-Tel

1- 15 oz can Tomato Sauce

1 packet taco seasoning mix

1 packet ranch dressing mix

1 1/2 cups water

Combine all ingredients, bring to a boil and then simmer for fifteen minutes.
*Just dump in cans, liquid and all!

Home School Help

2011-02-03T10:27:00.000-08:00

My sister recently sent me a link to a page that I have found very helpful. My oldest sons are taking upper level maths now, and frankly, I can't remember how to do Algebra 1, much less Algebra 2! Because we home school, we are utilizing a tutor for these subjects at our co-op. This means once a week they go to a class and are taught their 4 lessons for the coming week to be worked on at home. Sometimes, they forget what they are taught....or they just didn't quite "get" it the first time. This FREE website allows them to look up the subject of the lesson they need help on and then there is a short video that teaches them that concept. Now, each lesson begins with practice problems from a previous lesson, but we just click the fast forward button to get to the main lesson. The teacher does not necessarily teach it exactly like their tutor did, but they still usually find it very helpful. So far, we've only tried this with their Algebra lessons but there is also physics, history, and a couple of other subjects listed.

Check out HippoCampus!

Positive Reinforcement?

2011-02-01T14:08:00.000-08:00

Recently, my sister in law posted on Facebook a problem she was having with getting her 4 year old to pick up her toys. Her little darling, my precious niece, decided that she didn't want to pick them up and she wasn't going to pick them up. Her mother said she had tried everything, including bagging her toys up in the past and giving them away. This particular night she sent her to bed, without dinner.

I want my children to learn to do most things because of the inner satisfaction for doing it.

One person, whom I love dearly, offered a bit of advice which was basically, rather than punishing her, offer positive reinforcement to get the desired behavior. Many people would immediately agree with this advice. However, I have to say after 7 kids, positive reinforcement does not always achieve what I want it to achieve in my own personal experience.

Once in a while, I will reward my kids with a big prize.

When I adopted our last three little ones, we almost doubled our children and workload over night! We went from four children to seven...instantly! Needless to say, this has had its own set of challenges. Like laundry. Geeezzz! Does that stuff breed in the dark at night or what? And dishes, oh my! Floors always need mopped. Sheets are never changed enough. And the messes are endless! I knew I couldn't do it all right away. So I decided I was going to increase my children's allowance right away since the workload increased for them as well. This is certainly one way to use positive reinforcement! The kids are very helpful. I'm very blessed to have them helping me because they spend a lot of time cleaning. However, this has its limitations also. To give you an idea of what I'm talking about, consider this. Each of my children have been assigned a "jurisdiction" just like the Duggars describe. They are paid for the work done in their jurisdiction only. What happens when I ask Timothy to help in the kitchen, even though his paid jurisdiction is actually the dining room? At times, I've been known to hear "How much will you give me?" This is NOT the kind of character I wish to develop. This "positive reinforcement" is not accomplishing the goal of teaching my children to be helpful for no reason other than "it's right". I'm not suggesting that I do away with allowance, but I am suggesting that "positive reinforcement" is not going to achieve these goals of self-sacrifice or work ethics.

There are few rules that I follow with positive reinforcement that has really helped my childrens character and our family to run so more more peacefully.
First the "Do-Not's":
1. DO NOT ever, ever, use positive reinforcement to get a child to obey. If you do this, children will quickly begin to weigh their options to see of "obeying" pays enough. Children should learn to obey because it's right, not because it's "worth it" in terms of a prize reward.
2. DO NOT, as a general rule, use positive reinforcement on a planned basis for a long period of time. I say this because, in my experience,my children usually get bored with the prize. This always puts me in the position of constantly having to get bigger, better prizes for them, or they quit obeying. If they expect to be rewarded, then they will not work without the reward and only if the reward is worth it.

And last the "YES-DO's":

3. YES, DO give the children small prizes only. Trust me, if you give a bigger prize, the children will quickly become acclimated to it. Then, when you give them a little prize they really won't be impressed. Do you really want to constantly have to be one-upping yourself in prizes?
4. YES, DO give them prizes when you "catch" them doing right behavior! This is the biggie! You don't tell them they will get a prize IF they exhibit good behavior. You simply give it to them when you catch the doing it. The child is surprised. They are happy with their "small" prize because they weren't expecting to get anything. They are pleased as punch that you actually noticed the good behavior. In fact, they feel just as good that you noticed as they do about the prize. This generally makes my children WANT to do good, and not because you've promised them a prizes...remember, you're haven't promised them anything. Which brings me back to ONE last "DO-NOT" rule:

DO-NOT:
5. DO NOT give them a prize for every good behavior. If you do they'll come to expect them, even if there isn't any established rule about rewarding all good behavior with a prize. As soon as they think every "right" behavior deserves a prize, you are back to having a child who will weigh his options to see if the sacrifice of good behavior is worth the expected prize. Instead, give them lots of VERBAL reinforcement but only occasional prizes. Give rewards about...oh....maybe 50% of the time. I really don't have a hard percentage amount in mind.

This is what's worked best for my family and children, but I'm no expert! Each family has their own way of doing things and I love hearing from others and what works for them, so I thought I'd share what works for me:) Happy parenting!

Multitude Monday: 1000 Gifts # 500 - 520

2011-01-31T08:36:00.000-08:00

I love counting my blessings with Ann Voskamp each week. She's taught me a new way of living, thinking....even breathing. She breathes thankfulness. And I'm learning to do the same. I would love to get her book to learn more. Maybe you'd like her book also? Watch the book's trailer to see what you think....

500 - the beautiful rays of light streaming through the living room windows
501 - Eating out with my husband...alone!
502 - sale items that stretch our budget
503 - lovely warm weather over the past few days....spring is teasing me!
504 - the privilege of prayer
505 - coupons
506 - singing that uplifted my soul straight to His
507 - relaxing music
508 - the electric bill, much lower than we expected!
509 - Mom's health being protected by Him

510 - being entrusted with the nursery ministry (Oh God, help me to feel thankful)
511 - candle light
512 - a deeply needed hug from my oldest son and his assurance that he still loves me☺♥♥♥♥♥☺

513 - my new flash that my husband blessed me with
514 - Cinnamon Swirl Bread
515 - laughter

516 - pitter patter....yes, the sound of little feet running across the house! Thank you Lord for that warm sound!

517 - GMG group
518 - my dear sister who turned 31 today

519 - Funny pictures made by silly children....these gave me such a chuckle when I found them....

520 - Marty's recliner

I'm joining Ann Voskamp at...

"Home schoolers Look and Act Just Like Everyone Else"

2011-01-29T17:38:00.000-08:00

As home schooling becomes more mainstream the ever-fickle news reports are now lauding it as the next-great-thing. It's now becoming acceptable because many are noticing that home schoolers more closely resemble the world.

"And, proponents say, the home-schoolers of yesteryear, stereotyped as socially awkward, religiously dogmatic and ill-prepared for the real world, aren’t representative of current home-schoolers who more closely mirror the mainstream."

According to this article, home-schoolers are no longer "religiously dogmatic", and that makes this acceptable now? This is a disturbing idea to me, but not surprising. It doesn't take much to see that home-schoolers are very different today as opposed to the ones from the 80's who were being taken to court while fighting for the right to educate their kids at home primarily because of their religious beliefs!

I'm no psychology expert by any means, but I'm thinking that the reason why this makes the world more comfortable is because they don't feel as threatened by the home-schoolers that seem just like them. But as a Christian home-schooler, I'm not celebrating this new praise. I'm not comfortable with all of the fitting in that we seem to be doing now. It's just not....Christian.

I've always told my children that they would never "fit in" in a public school, if they were living for Christ the way God's word tells them to. Sadly, this is becoming very true at our Christian home-school co-op. My kids come home and tell me about some of the girls telling about wanting to have sex or about already having had it. They tell which kids cuss and which ones don't. One girl who made it very clear that she was interested in my oldest son, told him that she wanted to get pregnant and become a teen mom. She thought it was "romantic" after watching "A Secret Life of an American Teenager". This year, one troubled teen started home schooling for the first time as a 9th grader. At first she said she hated it and she would NOT be home-schooling next year. But within a couple of months she commented that she was liking home-schooling now and the kids there seemed just like all the public school kids....that they didn't seem "religious" at all.

"And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God." (Rom 12:2)

"Wherefore come out from among them, and be ye separate, saith the Lord, and touch not the unclean thing; and I will receive you, "
(2Co 6:17)

My kids are known as the "goody-goody" kids and have taken some flak for standing up for their beliefs. Like recently when one young man mentioned that he planned to play a song that had cussing in it at the Winter Dance, one of my son's said publicly on facebook that he didn't think he should play that kind of song. The boy's response? "Homeschooler:p" It would seem that as our home school group becomes more "mainstream" my kids are no longer fitting in with even them.

Recipe: Mama's Vegetable Spaghetti

2011-01-28T09:37:00.000-08:00

Years ago, when my husband was courting me, he had the opportunity to come over to my home and share a meal with us. On this occasion, we were having Mama's Spaghetti. We loved her homemade spaghetti and really didn't know what a "jar" spaghetti tasted like (I loved jazzed up jar sauce today!). You see, we grew up "poor" by most people's standards. For years, we raised our own pork and beef. And we had a huge garden that Mama would put up all the extra vegetables so that in the winter, when work was scarce for Daddy, there would be enough for all of us. My mother cooked almost everything from scratch. Ronnie on the other hand was used to Prego or Ragu sauce. Imagine his surprise when my non-vegetable eating husband got a plate of my mother's homemade spaghetti sauce, only to see~gasp~vegetables in it! To this day, he swears there was corn in it...there was not ~smile~. BUT it did have green peppers and onions. And it was very good! My grandmother (who prided herself on being an excellent cook) once asked, to my mother's surprise, how to make spaghetti like her. Today we affectionately call this recipe, Mama's Vegetable Spaghetti because that's what Ronnie called it from them on, "Vegetable Spaghetti".

Mama's Vegetable Spaghetti

2 lbs ground beef
2 pkgs of spaghetti sauce seasoning mix
1 or 2 large onions
1 or 2 bell peppers
1 celery stick
1 can tomato sauce (the size of a can of cream of chicken soup)
Directions:
Chop all the vegetables (small) before you start with the meat. Make sure they are cut very small. Begin browning ground beef. When half done, add vegetables. Finish browning and drain fat. Add of spaghetti seasoning mix and tomato sauce. Use can to add 1 can of hot water to it. Add water as needed.

Something of GREAT VALUE to God ~1 Peter 3:4-5~

2011-01-27T15:11:00.000-08:00

There is a precious woman named Denise at our home school co-op that I greatly admire. The most beautiful thing about her is her light for Christ that shines so brightly on the people all around her. She genuinely smiles at people and will give the sweetest pats when she's talking to them be it adult or child. When she talks to the children, she'll squat and give them eye contact, a beautiful smile and her undivided attention. You can almost see the love coming from her as talks to them! She speaks with such a cheerful, gentle voice to everyone, that it's almost soothing to talk with her. Her voice is just so pleasant! It's neither too loud or too soft. She seems to be genuinely interested in everything I'm saying if we ever have the occasion to talk with each other. I would really, really like to get to know her better. She uplifts me just by the way she so sweetly talks to others. I just love to watch her interact with people. She just seems....soft. Gentle. Loving.

I admire her so much! She reminds me of the scripture that I just love and yearn to live, "But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price. For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands:
(1Pe 3:4-5)"
What do others think when they see me? What "atmosphere" do I project to others...especially to my husband and children? Does my husband see me as soft? For the next seven day's I'm going to make it a goal to have every action, word or thought spoken pass a test ~ The Meek and Quiet Test. The word meek means "mild, that is quiet" in the Greek. The word "quiet" actually means "keeping one's seat, still (as in UNDISTURBED and UNDISTURBING), peaceable and quiet" in the Greek. What an awesome challenge! The Bible says a spirit like this is of GREAT PRICE in the sight of God! So for the next seven days, I'm going to try to encourage myself to live in this meek and quiet state by making sure that words, actions and heart all pass the test.

~♥The Meek and Quiet Test♥~

Am I making a conscious decision to speak quietly, as in "not loud" ?
Could what I'm thinking be described as mild? Peaceable? Undisturbed?
Am I talking gently, carefully choosing my words?
Is my actions projecting peace and reflecting a peaceful state? Or are they harsh...such as slamming doors or banging dishes because I'm angry (a clear reflection of nonpeaceful state)?
Would my family describe my words and actions as being undisturbing?
Am I behaving with self-control?
If I find it necessary to correct my children, am I doing it as gently as possible with a soft and kind (but firm) spirit?
At the end of 7 days, I will go to my husband and children for an honest opinion. If they would not describe my behavior as meek and quiet, I will accept their opinion...meekly and quietly.☺

Multitude Monday: 1000 Gifts #449 - 499

2011-01-24T09:22:00.000-08:00

Slowing to see His graces, His multitudes of gifts

449 - Julia's birthday
450 - My precious son's birthday ~ a deep soul with a heart of gold
451 - Time with my family
452 - Directing my mother to the "right" doctor
453 - new dishwasher ~ such a blessing
454 - Thanksgiving with friends
455 - gifts to wrap
456 - fire place that gives such a cozy warmth
457 - coupons
458 - Christ's sacrifice - it began when He left heaven
459 - our keyboard - it plays beautifully and my children are learning to play on it
460 - husband who listened to me pour my heart out tonight~ without judgment, only understanding.
461 - revealing some heart issues with one of my children - an answered prayer, as I've prayed for so long, "Show me their heart, that I might teach them rightly".
462 - no hunger in our home
463 - stacks and shelves of wisdom, at my fingertips
464 - advent
465 - that my son's girlfriend does not attend church with us ( I would love for her to attend church with us but last night at church it occurred to me that since he's SO focused on her right now, I'm very glad he's not distracted by her presence right now. Or should I say completely distracted?)
466 - God's love proclaimed in poem, set to the most beautiful music last night at church...I so needed to hear this message
477 - Disney
478 - Chuckee Cheese's
479 - little one who whispers a quiet, sleepy, "thank you" after my lips brush her soft cheek as she sleeps
480 - snow days
481 - sledding on boxes
482 - new coat for my birthday
483 - Brina's birthday
484 - husband's protection during his wreck
485 - new dishwasher - so thankful for this for I would live in the kitchen without it!
486 - nice trip to Florida to visit with family
487 - Tony's wedding
488 - Easy Grammar....I'm getting it finally!
489 - new insights into God's word
490 - renewed spirit after my early, unplanned nap!
491 - our keyboard
492 - mocha coffee
493 - Spring...it'll soon be here. What better way to make you appreciate the Spring than to live the winter...not discontentedly, but expectantly
494 - son's rearrangement of the Living Room

Sarah's Chocolate Pie...that she used 9 eggs to learn how to make the meringue! 12 eggs if you count the ones that I broke when helping to clean up and I dropped the cartoon, and the eggs flew. Completely worth the eggs...not because the pie was great (it needs some work) but because she's developing new skills.

495 - daughter's baking. She's getting better and better as she learns new skills.
496 - husband's message (but not really his...really it was His) on being refined
497 - snuggling with Josh in bed the other night where memories were recalled and Chuckee Cheese was the topic
498 - the eyes to see what Josh needs to be bonding more with us
499 - Sons' first dance! They were so handsome.

Hiatus Over....Back to Following a Schedule!

2011-01-24T07:56:00.000-08:00

Who can follow a schedule when there is a rare moment like this to be enjoyed?

It seems my Christmas hiatus has been extended as we (I) have struggle to get back into our routine. I've actually felt the home school "blues" more than I have ever felt in my life! We came home from Christmas in South Carolina and Florida to find that Jessica and Hannah had fevers. It took almost 2 weeks for Hannah to remain fever free. So we attempted to get back on schedule again the next week but not successfully. The next week we had an ice storm that hit the south, and our schedule was again thrown off. The next week was better but the home school blues hit hard! This morning was still a bit of a struggle. My precious little darling, Hannah, climbed up in my lap as we were doing Bible and fell back asleep. Then it was so chilly this morning....Hannah needed a blanket right? I fell back asleep and slept for an hour and a half. BUT the good news is I woke up feeling GREAT. I feel like I could conquer the world now with His help! So I'm hoping to blog again later today. I've got a couple of things on my heart right now.

Holidays 2010

2011-01-06T10:33:00.000-08:00

I haven't posted in a couple of weeks because I was out of town a few days before Christmas till Monday, two days ago. We've covered a lot of miles this year as we went "home" to South Carolina and then down to Florida to attend my brother-in-laws wedding. All of it was wonderful!

My husband was in a wreck not long before we left to visit family, so he was in a little pain but I'm thankful that it was minor. His van was totaled but the insurance company has agreed to give us a generous amount for it. We praise God that we have found favor with them.

Bell-Ringers for the King Baby

This year, I wanted to add a new element to worshiping the King Baby. I wanted to give Him a gift....the gift of my time (is there anything more valuable than that?) and service. So I talked to some of my children and they agreed to serve Him also by helping ring bells one morning for the Salvation Army. It was such a small thing....I'm surely not bragging about it. But I enjoyed it so much I thought maybe if I told other's about it, they will agree to do it also next year! I was such a pleasure to see people giving. My oldest two sons, Michael and Stephen and my daughter, Sarah agreed to ring bells with me. So we "manned" two buckets at two doors of Wal-Mart. My kids and I made some interesting observations. The ones who were the most happy, smiley, and cheerful were the ones who gave the most. We also noticed that it seemed much of the time, the ones who "seemed" to have less, were the most often the ones who gave. What a blessing it was to see people give so generously and selflessly.

We opened gifts on December 20th. Our kids got several nice things each and they all enjoyed their gifts immensely!

Hannah Joy opening her gifts

Jessica Hope was so happy with her "favorite princess"!

Joshua James was thrilled to have a RC Plane.

Sarah Mackenzie loved her Nintendogs game!

Timothy Cole LOVED his Star Wars Lego's!

Stephen Tyler was very happy with all his new DVD's!

Michael was still half asleep when he opened his stuff, lol.

Michael got a movie he's fond of. Me? I'm not so fond of it.


Christmas 2010 We had lots of fun and laughter in South Carolina with family.

Sarah spending a few minutes in the Word at Granny's.

Time out for park fun!

Static!!!!

The girls had fun with a friend:)

Jen opening her gag gift from Sarah - a "dishwasher" outfit, lol.

Mom opening her gift from us. Her healing was the best gift I got this year!

"What is it?"

Lots of laughter and fun!

What's a family get-together without the big kids aggravating the little ones?

Jessica:)

Sarah and Hailey, my great niece.

Joshua

Joshua showing me his "cool" pose!

My nephew and his daughter...my GREAT niece!

Cards and family= fun, fun, fun!

My mom and Aunt Ella Mae.

My aunts dog a.k.a. floor duster, lol.

The girls had fun snuggling in Granny's bed for a movie.

Happy birthday Jesus!

Good times people!

Lacey looks angelic doesn't she?

Brina was a great inn keeper!

My sweet nieces made the perfect "angels".

My nieces did great in their Christmas play.

Do you love my makeup? My 5 year old niece did it for me, lol!

Then we went to Florida for a wedding...and sneaked in a surprise trip to Disney for the kids.

The Buzz Lightyear ride was awesome!

The Castle was breathtaking! And it changed colors!

The Bride and her father (literally...he was a Greek Orthodox Father but also her daddy)

The Groom dancing with his mother, my step-mother-in-law.

This was the Swiss Family Robinson Treehouse at Disney. The whole thing was fake, as in not a real tree or leaves!

Our first ride was the Aladin ride.

Splash Mountain. If you notice Joshua's face, he was NOT having fun!

The ferry carried people to the resort or to the parking lot area (we rode it when leaving but was too tired to really enjoy it).


Lunch time!

One of the many different colors of the castle.

Ronnie and the older boys went to ride something on their own, leaving me with these guys. At night. In a crowd of thousands. I was one paranoid mama about losing one of my babies!

Hannah made this face all day, lol.

Almost time to leave....we were tired!

Watching the fireworks!

Oldest son, Michael.

Stephen, second born

Castle!!!

We had fun on the teacup ride!

Michael sure is enthusiastic in this picture!

VERY TIRED

The End

Parenting 101...

2011-01-03T17:53:00.000-08:00

I have SO much to post about and will later when I have time, but I just wanted to do a quick drive-by post for parents who are struggling with knowing how to practically teach their children to behave. My sister is a wonderful mother and has started a blog just about parenting. Her credentials? First and foremost, she parents from a Christian perspective. Aside from that, she has 3 BEAUTIFUL daughters...my nieces that I love dearly....and they are VERY well behaved! She really has great instincts as a mother and I think anyone can benefit from her words of wisdom.

So if you need some practical ideas on how to discipline and teach your children to be well-behaved, check out her awesome blog, What's a Mother To Do?

My Anthem for 2011

2010-12-19T10:30:00.000-08:00

My husband has used this in several of his sermons and I love it. It's my 2011 anthem~my battle cry for 2011.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The decision has been made. I'm a disciple of His. I won't look back, let up, slow down, back away, or be still. My past is redeemed, my present makes sense, my future is hopeful.
I'm finished and I'm done with low living, sight walking, small planning, smooth knees, colorless dreams, tame visions, mundane talking, chintzy giving, and dwarf goals.
I no longer need preeminence, prosperity, position, promotion, platitudes, or popularity. I don't have to be right, first, tops, recognized, praised, regarded, or rewarded. I now live by His presence, learn by faith, walk by patience, lift by prayer, and labor by power.
My face is set. My gait is fast. My goal is Heaven. My road is narrow. My way is rough. My companions few. My God reliable. My mission clear.
I cannot be bought, compromised, returned, lured away, turned back, deluded, or delayed. I will not flinch in the face of sacrifice, hesitate in the presence of adversity, negotiate at the table of the enemy, ponder at the pool of popularity, or meander in the maze of mediocrity.
I won't give up, shut up, or let up until I have stayed up, stored up, prayed up, paid up, and preached up for the cause of Christ. I am a disciple of Jesus.
I must go until He comes. Give till I drop. Preach till all know, and work till He stops me. And when He comes for His own, He'll have no problem recognizing me. - Author Unknown
If any man come to me, and hate not his father, and mother, and wife, and children, and brethren, and sisters, yea, and his own life also, he cannot be my disciple - Luke 14:26

A Christmas Miracle!

2010-12-16T14:47:00.000-08:00

"....He commanded our fathers to teach their children so that a future generation
--children YET to be born--
might know.

They were to rise and tell their children so that they might put their confidence in God

and not forget God's works but keep His commandments.

Then they would not be like their fathers, a stubborn and rebellious generation,

a gerneration whose heart was not loyal and whose spirit was not faithful to God."

My last post was asking for prayer for my mother. Anne graciously let me know that she would pray for her. Anne, thank you...from the bottom of my heart for that!

So I wanted to let you know how God has heard and answered this prayer. The doctor who was doing the biopsy found this mass after doing an endoscopy. He then did xrays and a CT scan to try and determine what was going on. He also said he was certain that this mass had "been there awhile". The xrays and CT scan only made him more concerned. He said was "at least moderately concerned" a few days ago in his office and today before the procedure he said he was "very concerned". He was preparing us for the worst. But cancer is no match for my God. Cancer was only a tool used to build our faith and help us to rely more on Him! It was a tool to teach us.

The doctor took my mother back into the surgery area in order to do the biopsy. He came back a short while later and told my sister in the waiting room (I'm 3 hours away and had no babysitter) that he doesn't understand what happened but it was practically gone. He still biopsied the little spot that was left but he was no longer concerned about this at all. He doesn't know what happened but I do.

My God happened!

So Anne, here is the result of your prayer and many other's. Thank you so much for praying.

The scripture at the top of this blog is part of what I've been praying over this...that God would intervene in such a way that I can tell my children and grandchildren of His wondrous works and goodness so that a generation, not yet born will learn to fear God and worship Him and Him alone.

Merry Christmas!

☺♥☺♥☺♥Michelle☺♥☺♥☺♥

"Komen for the Cure" supports Planned Parenthood

2010-12-15T11:10:00.000-08:00

I found this article today and was shocked. Ever since my mother-in-law died three years ago of breast cancer, I've been buying "pink". I have tried for 2 years to participate in a fund raising walk and had decided I was just going to have to participate in the Atlanta walk, Susan G. Komen's 3 Day Walk for the Cure.

Most of you will not care about this article, but for those who do, did you know that Komen is supporting abortion???? Did you know there is a pretty significant link between breast cancer and abortion? When I've been buying all those "pink" Komen yogurts, wrapping paper, cereal's etc. I have been inadvertently been supporting abortion. And more women will probably get breast cancer because of it.

Now that I know, I'm responsible for how I use this info. Now that you know, you are too. Just saying.

P.S. Much like the major medical organizations who, for years...decades even, claimed that smoking does NOT cause cancer...then it was "may" cause cancer, some claim that abortion does NOT cause breast cancer. There is enough evidence to convince me that no responsible organization would support abortion if they are truly trying to cure breast cancer.

Is He still God?

2010-12-14T17:30:00.000-08:00

Recently, we found out that my mom has a "mass" in the back of her throat or in her nasal cavity. Tomorrow, she goes in for a biopsy. I've tried hard to not let my mind wander...and to not call mama crying about being scared of losing her. I'm a mama's girl to say the least. I'm trying so hard to not let my imagination run away with me or to let my thoughts be consumed by this. For the past few days, as I've thought and prayed about this, God has whispered some profound words into my heart. "Am I still God? Am I still on YOUR throne? Will I still be on the throne *if* this is cancer?" The more I've thought about this...the more I've poured out my heart to God (which frankly, has not been very well....sometimes words just fail me) the more I've soaked in His truths. One particular one that I read this past week was:

This isn't happening TO you....It's happening FOR you.

Did you catch that? It's happening FOR ME....and MY MOM...and MY SISTER, etc. God gives us an awesome promise in His word that brings this into perspective.

"We know that all things work together for the good of those who love God: those who are called according to His purpose."~Romans 8:28

It should come as no surprise that because of this ongoing conversation and meditation that I've had going all week, I've had a type of peace that I don't usually have under these kinds of circumstances. So when my husband called me about 7:30 a.m. this morning to tell me that he'd been in a wreck and had totaled the van, I was far more peaceful. It happened for us...not to us !

God hasn't given me any promises that tomorrow's biopsy will reveal that Mom doesn't have cancer. But it has reminded me that, yes, He's still on the throne. No. Matter. What.

In His hands,
Michelle

P.S. My sister wrote an excellent blog about this trial that is very encouraging. My niece is amazing and I think her story will bless anyone who's going through a trial right now.

If you have time and feel led, please pray for my Mom! I would so appreciate everyone's prayers and so would my mom.

A Simple Lunch

2010-12-13T10:31:00.000-08:00

Finding recipes that my family will eat that is also healthy is a challenge around here. One thing I like to make that is healthy (and simple) is just mixed fruit. I cut up various fruits and mix them up in a bowl. This kids love this! Usually, I try to get fruits that are in season and the least expensive, so the fruits vary, but it's always good. Today, I tried to make a easy "dressing" that turned out well and the picky-kids loved it.

Fruit Salad Dressing

8oz cool whip (thawed)
3oz Jello (they recommend strawberry, cherry or banana but I used orange because that's what I had in the pantry. I had lots of oranges in the mixed fruit anyhow so it turned out well.)

The recipe actually calls for 3oz of cottage cheese, but my children aren't huge fans of it so I left that out. Just a spoonful on a bowl of fruit coats the whole bowl. Yummy!

GREAT Parenting Advice

2010-12-09T13:54:00.000-08:00

"For this reason, each time our child needs discipline we must deal with the heart, not just the outward manifestation."~Anne @ http://iliveinanantbed.blogspot.com/

Once in a blue moon, I run across some parenting advice that is exceptional. My blogger friend, Anne, has given such advice. I agree with every word she has written and her advice is exactly how my husband and I have chosen to parent our children.

I am told quite often how "wonderful" my children are and sometimes people will follow this up with how "lucky" I am to have such children. I've even had parents that have told me that I didn't know what it's like to have such "strong-willed", "ADD" children. There is no "luck" involved in it. Anne's blog explains so well what I just don't have the writing skills to explain.
Read her blog here and be blessed by her wonderful words of wisdom!

Praying for Your Pastor's Wife...

2010-12-09T12:57:00.000-08:00

Often, we remember to pray for our pastor, but how many of us remember to pray for our pastor's wife? If there is one (human) person in a pastor's life that can bring out the best in him OR bring out the worst in him, I think it's the pastor's wife.

So by praying for your pastor's wife, you can also bless your pastor. Recently, I joined a Facebook group called, "31 Days of Praying for Your Pastor's Wife". I was reading through their daily prayers and I think they are fantastic. I found myself praying this not only for my pastor's wife but also for myself. I can't think of anything I'd rather get for Christmas, than the assurance that someone is praying these prayers for me. I did not find any copyright and I looked to see if they are based on a book and as far as I can tell they are not. These are not my prayers; I compiled this list from their prayers over the past 31 days.

31 Days of Prayer For Our Pastor's Wife

Day 1- Lord, please bless my pastor's wife and may she love You with all her heart, soul, mind, and strength. May Your Spirit work in her heart in power, and may she value and follow Biblical priorities. (Deut. 6:5; Matt. 6:33)

Day 2 - Pray that she will cultivate strong character and uncompromising integrity. Pray that her testimony will be genuine, and that she will guard her heart. (1 Tim. 1:5; 3:7; Prov. 4:23)

Day 3- Pray for her personal walk with God- that her soul and spirit will be nourished and strengthened in her times with Him. Pray that she will spend more time in the Word of god than in reading Christian books and articles. (2 Tim. 2:15-16; Ps. 119:7)

Day 4- Pray that your pastor's wife will counsel and teach with discernment through the wise use of Scripture and faith in God's power. (Ps. 119:99; James 1:5-6) Pray she will be filled with peace beyond understanding and be strengthened and led by the Holy Spirit as she ministers to the women all around her.

Day 5-Ask God to protect her marriage and keep it strong as a model of the Church’s submission to Christ. Pray that she will respect and practice godly submission to her husband’s leadership, and that her husband will love and cherish her. (Eph. 5:23-33)

Day 6- Pray that God will protect your pastor's wife from discouragement and bitterness when she or her husband faces inevitable criticism. Pray that she will trust in the wisdom of the Word of God to answer her critics, and commit herself into the hands of God, who judges righteously. (Heb. 12:15; Ps. 119:42; Col. 4:6; Prov. 31:26; 1 Pet. 2:23)

Day 7- Pray that your pastor's wife will remember truth and practical principles from the Word of God during times of trial, and that the Scriptures will bring her comfort. Pray that the Word will become her delight and song when circumstances are tough. (Ps. 119:28,52)

Day 8-Ask God to protect your pastor's wife from the evil plots of satan. Pray that she will not be corrupted as she rubs shoulders with the world. (John 17:15;Isa. 54:17;Ps. 91:9-11

Day 9- Pray that God will build a hedge of protection around her marriage, and that she and her husband will be aware of the potential for any improper relationships. Pray that their family time will be protected. (Matt. 19:6; Prov. 31:11a; 2 Cor. 10:4-5)

Day 10-Pray that your pastor’s wife will be morally pure and that she will wear the armor of God so that she will not fall into temptation. Ask God to guard her heart concerning the use of free time, and that she will be especially discerning in her use of emails, the Internet, television, and other media. (Rom. 13:14; Eph. 6:10-18)

Day 11- Pray that God will bring godly friends and encouragers to your pastor’s wife and her family, to strengthen them for the ministry and to provide meaningful fellowship, accountability, and times of rest. (Ps. 55:14; 119:

Day 12- Pray that she will be a woman of prayer and worship, and that she will lead by example—teaching women how to walk in a close relationship with the Father. (1 Thes. 5:17; Acts 1:14a; Mark 1:35; Matt. 4:10; Titus 2:4-5)

Day 13-Your pastor’s wife is a busy woman. Pray that she will make wise lifestyle choices in order to protect her health, especially in the areas of exercise, eating moderately, and getting sufficient rest. Pray for times of relaxation and renewal to balance the stress of ministry. (Rom. 12:1-2; 1 Cor. 9:27; 6:19-20; 10:13; Prov. 31:17)

ay 14-Pray that your pastor’s wife will focus on the Word of God and walk by faith in the fear of the Lord—rather than the fear of man. Pray that she will not seek acceptance from others or compare herself with them, but that she will discover true freedom in her position in Christ. (Prov. 19:23; 31:30; Heb. 11:6; 2 Tim. 2:15; Ps. 119:45; Eph. 1:3-12)

Day 15-Pray that she will cooperate with her husband in providing godly leadership in their home, not based on fear of what others will think, but according to scriptural truth. (Eph. 6:4; Col. 3:20-21)

Day 16-Pray that her children will be taught of the Lord and experience His peace. Pray that the pressures of the ministry will not discourage or embitter them. (Isa. 54:13)

Day 17-Pray that your pastor’s wife will be an example of contentment, thankful for God’s supply. Pray that her sufficiency will be in God’s abounding grace. (1 Tim. 6:6, 8)

Day 18-Ask God to provide for the financial needs of your pastor and his family. Pray that your pastor’s wife will be a wise steward in caring for her family and using funds entrusted to her care. Pray that her heart will be turned away from selfish gain and worthless things. (Phil. 4:19; Heb. 13:5; 1 Tim. 6:11; Ps. 37:25; 119:36-37)

Day 19- Pray that your pastor's wife will use time wisely, seek god's perspective for her schedule and priorities, and guard against unnecessary interruptions. Pray that she will seek and obey God's will, rather than trying to meet everyone else's expectations. ( Eph. 5:15-16; Col. 4:5; Ps. 90:12; Prov. 31:27)

Day 20-Ask God to remind her of the hope and refuge God offers her each day. Pray that she will be encouraged in God, knowing that He is a firm, secure anchor for her soul. (Ps. 9:9-10; Ps. 42:5; 71:14; Heb. 6:19a)

Day 21-Pray that your pastor’s wife will be wise in her conversations, choosing her words carefully to encourage respect for her husband and the church, and to edify her sisters in the Lord. Pray that she will know how to respond to gossip, and that she will always speak with kindness and compassion. (Prov. 21:23; 31:26; 1 Pet. 3:10; Prov. 11:13

Day 22-Pray that she will serve others with God’s agape love and encourage them with His wisdom and compassion. (Gal. 5:13b; Phil. 2:3-4; Prov. 31:20)

Day 23-Pray for spiritual unity between the pastor’s wife and others in the church—especially other staff members’ wives. Pray that the enemy will not be allowed to create divisions, strife, or misunderstanding in any way. (Rom. 14:19; 1 Cor. 12:25)

Day 24-Pray that your pastor’s wife will be clothed with strength and dignity. Pray that she will have a gentle and gracious spirit, and represent the Lord well as His ambassador. (Prov. 31:25a; 2 Cor. 5:20a; 1 Pet. 3:4)

Day 25-Pray that your pastor’s wife will seek God for personal revival and revival in your church and community. Pray that she will quickly repent when she sins or strays from her Good Shepherd’s side, and that she learn the will and ways of God. (2 Chron. 7:14)

Day 26-Pray that your pastor’s wife will think biblically—with the mind of Christ—and practice the expression of her faith with boldness in places of influence. (Ps. 119:46)

Day 27-Pray that she will earnestly seek God’s will and be committed to instant and complete obedience—ready for God to work powerfully in and through her life and ministry. (1 Sam. 15:22; 2 Cor. 10:3-5; Luke 9:23-24)

Day 28-Pray that she will strive for personal excellence as a “Proverbs 31” woman, and will believe God to accomplish His will in her as a virtuous woman. (Prov. 31:10-31)

Day 29-Pray that your pastor’s wife will be a woman of faith and passionate love for God, not giving in to worries, fears, or an uptight and anxious spirit. (1 John 4:18; Prov. 3:5-6)

Day 30-Pray that the Word will be her counselor, and that she will serve the Lord with gladness, and encourage others to worship with a joyful, surrendered spirit. (Isa. 61:3; Ps. 119:24)

Day 31-Pray that your pastor’s wife will be humble and authentic in her faith, not given to pride or hypocrisy. Pray that she will have pure motives and give God glory for every gain or victory. (Mic. 6:8; Gal. 6:14; John 7:17-18; 1 Cor. 10:13)

Keep Your Breasts to Yourself, Please and Thank You

2010-12-08T04:53:00.000-08:00

I have a couple of blogs that I really love, written by Christian women. These women seem to truly love the Lord. One of them has a food blog and I love her recipes! The other offers women lots of godly advice on being a wife and mother. I appreciate these women's hearts! Occassionally though, these women are dressed in clothing that falls short of being modest. If I go into Walmart and see breasts, I'm not surprised. But when women present themself as representing Christ, and they do this...then I admit it....it bothers me. If I can see your breasts, it's not modest. I love this video of Beth Moore and her take on modesty! My sister shared this video with me awhile back and I thought some like-minded people might enjoy hearing it also. And if you aren't like-minded on this subject, maybe it'll cause you to think about this topic from a different perspective. Beth Moore has an some EXCELLENT advice for women on the subject of modesty and clothing.

Deliberate effort

2010-12-03T19:27:00.000-08:00

"People do not drift towards holiness. Apart from grace-driven effort, people
do not gravitate toward godliness, prayer, obedience to Scripture, faith
and delight in the Lord. We drift toward compromise and call it
...tolerance; we drift toward superstition and call it faith. We cherish the indicsipline of lost self-control and call it relaxation; we slouch toward prayerlessness and delude ourselves into thinking we have escaped legalism; we slide toward godlessness and convince ourselves we have been liberated." D.A.
Carson, from For the Love of God

Christmas Yummy's

2010-12-02T07:44:00.000-08:00

For years we've made what I call "Christmas Cookies" (because we only make them at Christmas time).

It's a very simple recipe. You put peanut butter between 2 Ritz crackers to make a sandwich cookie. Then, you melt white almond bark (we always called it "white chocolate" but the package usually says "white almond bark") in the microwave and then you dip the Ritz cookie in the almond bark. Set it on some wax paper to dry. Leave it plain or add some sprinkles to jazz it up. We've dipped nuts and pretzels in it before also. Christy Jordan has given me some new ideas for a new twist on this old idea! I think I'm gonna let the kids make some of these to give away to their Sunday School teachers and neighbors. And for me.☺

Recipe for Holly Jollies here.

I'm baaack......

2010-12-01T11:53:00.000-08:00

I know everyone has been standing on edge, awaiting my next post, lol. Well, you're in luck. (jk) I'm in the "mood" to write tonight. ☺

So where have I been? Doing the family "thang" of course! And giving thanks to God for my uncountable, innumerable, uncontainable blessings from a very personal, almighty, loving God.

Here's a rundown of my past week:
Monday - I was up bright and early and @ the church by 6:45 a.m. I managed to clean the carpet in the nursery and spot clean in the hallway. I was at Walmart by 8:15 a.m. I have now decided that's the BEST time to go to Walmart, especially at this busy, commercial time of year. Came home and spent the remainder of the day packing and cleaning in prep for going to see my wonderful family for the holidays.
Tuesday - Finished packing, loading, and cleaning. (why is it I just *have* to have the house spotless when I leave???) Went to SC for Thanksgiving.

Wednesday - Went grave-hopping. Visited my son's grave, tried to find my brother's, went to my father's. Never made it to my mother-in-love's. Baked food in prep for our feast and let the kids bake cookies and decorate them. They never get tired of this! Ended the evening playing games:)

Thursday - Watched the parade on TV...love the parade! Then we had a wonderful day eating our feast with family and thanking God for His many blessings throughout the day.

Friday - We celebrated my beautiful nieces birthday's with an ice skating party! They are wonderful young ladies and so sweet! Afterwards, I enjoyed dinner with my Mom.☺

My beautiful Mother with Jessica and Hannah

Saturday - Off to The Nutcracker:) We enjoyed this event with almost my entire family and it was wonderful! So much fun:)

Homemade Snowman Ornament

2010-11-20T18:28:00.000-08:00

Timmy's Snowman Ornament

I found an adorable snowman ornament that the kids can make at home with little help that we just loved! Most importantly, it can be made very quickly if you have the supplies on hand!

Check this website out for complete instructions on how to make these cute snowmen!

Laughing Until I Cry

2010-11-19T07:39:00.000-08:00

My kids can keep me laughing or crying at any given moment. Sometimes, they make me laugh until I cry!.☺

This past week we were learning about the Tabernacle that God had Moses and the Children of Israel build in the wilderness. I explained to the kids how God had provided for them in that wilderness by providing them with a bread-like food that was sweet like honey that they called "Manna". After that, I taught them about the Ark of the Covenant. I explained that God had the Children of Israel put three things in the Ark of the Covenant: The Ten Commandments, Aaron's Rod and a sample of Manna. At the end of the lesson I reviewed with them asking, "What did God tell the Israelites to put in the Ark of the Covenant?" Josh answered, "Aaron's rod, The Ten Commandments, and Banana Bread."

This morning I noticed that Timothy had lovely pink nails. So I asked, "Timmy, why are your nails painted pink?" Timmy proceeds to tell me that it's because he and Sarah made a "deal". He wanted to use her DS charger and in exchange his sister got to paint his nails....AND take a picture to prove it, lol.

Just last week, Timmy made the mistake of shooting Sarah in the head with a nerf dart. Sarah said, "That was a very bad decision. I wake up randomly all through the night." And wake up she did! Timmy woke up like this:

Life is tough when your sister was the only girl for 7 years! I think Timmy should rethink messing with Sarah!

Multitude Monday: 1000 Gifts #434-444

2010-11-15T06:15:00.000-08:00

I'm so thankful for:
434- curriculum to teach my children from
435 - my mother-in-loves China cabinet
436 - computers
437- nursery ministry
438 - alarm clocks
439 - hubby's sweetness with me...trying to not wake me so I can get a few extra minutes of sleep (but we were late for church after that, lol)
440 - tomorrow's Thanksgiving feast with friends
441 - rain
442 - doggies - devoted doggies
443 - husband mailing the Eluminatus payment for me
444 - schedules, they work if I work them!

Holidays or Holy days?

2010-11-12T20:04:00.000-08:00

Last Christmas was awesome. One of the most memorable in my life. I...no, my whole family's focus was more on the Lord than it has ever been. We did our Jesse Tree devotions nightly. The kids learned so much from them. We worshiped the Babe all season. It was a Christmas like no other that I've ever had and I left that season feeling as it I had been in a two month revival! I'm already looking forward to being "revived" this season! I really want this season to not just be a "holiday" season, but a "holy" season!

How can I make this a holy season?

Devotions: I love the Jesse Tree devotions. What a beautiful way to remember Christ is the reason for the season!
Give our biggest gift to Christ. I realized a long time ago that, in spite of what other's will teach you, I am not giving Christ a "gift" by giving my kids or family a Christmas gift. Giving to my family does not qualify as a gift to Christ. How do I know? The Bible says that when we give to the hungry, naked and sick, we are giving to Him (Matthew 25:34-40). My family is none of these things! So how will I give to Christ this year? We will give to various charities, both of our time and our money. We will give to Jesus by giving to the least of these.
Minimize spending. Going into to debt...or just plain spoiling our children does NOT bring glory to the Lord. Furthermore, there is really NO benefit for the kids to be given lots of stuff they don't even want half the time. We took steps years ago to limit our children's gifts. Today, we limit each child to $50. After seeing my children open massive amounts of gifts one Christmas (about $100 to $150 per child...modest compared to some families), we were supposed to clean up and then head to SC to visit with our family. My daughter was lagging...she really just didn't want to clean up her stuff! After telling her multiple times to pick her stuff up, I finally threatened, "If you don't pick your stuff up, I will throw it away!" She looked me square in the eyes and without ever even pausing to think about it, said, "Okay, I don't want them." You see, by that time she'd already picked up the stuff she cared about. The brand new toys lying on the floor? She didn't want them 30 minutes after opening them! I learned a valuable lesson that day:

Kids don't need everything to be happy.
Most of what I spent for Christmas was a waste (and trust me...it was FAR less than most people spent on their child that I knew of!)
I had lost my focus on what Christmas is really about...and it's not about "giving", or "cookies", or even "loving people". It's about Christ and Christ alone.
They wouldn't be devastated if they got less stuff.

4. I will play Christian Christmas music to set a worshipful mood.
5. This Christmas, I will spend more time with the Lord than I spend shopping. If the season is really about Him, why don't I act like it by spending more time with Him?

Multitude Monday: 1000 Gifts #413 - 433

2010-11-08T13:01:00.000-08:00

It's been months since I posted my gratitude list and this list was started in May. So much has happened since then to be grateful for....and yet I stopped counting. How much of His goodness have I missed because I quit looking...counting? A fresh start with a old list awaits!

413. my refrigerator broke down right before my husband got his bonus check! I'm so grateful we had the money to by a new one.
414. Husbands bonus check was for $1370....the cost of the new refrigerator and new upright deep freezer? $1368.20....we got the fridge and freezer before we new how much the check would be! Thank you Lord.
415. New AC!
416. wildflowers on the side of the road
417. caterpillars that bring the excitement of learning to children
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
418. fresh starts
419. doctor's discovered Mom's low hemoglobin before they gave her blood thinners
420. God is with mama. Always.
421. Christmas tree already in my living room
422. firewood
423. my sister's blog with words of wisdom that I needed to hear...spoken from God to her...to me
424. plenty to eat
425. piano lessons
426. the privilege of serving God in the nursery ministry
427. people who are praying for my loved ones for me
428. Mrs. Macy McClendon who went to be with Jesus yesterday.
429. curriculum All About Spelling
430. President George Washington, the first president in the US to declare a day of thanks:)
431. President Abraham Lincoln, the first president to make Thanksgiving a national holiday
432. tabernacles built at home
433. learning to make the sacrifices of praise, giving and sharing (Hebrews 13)

What to do When I Am in a Funk

2010-11-06T20:09:00.000-07:00

Things to do when I am in a funk:

Control your thoughts; do not let your thoughts control you! "For though we walk in the flesh, we do not war according to the flesh. For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal but mighty in God for pulling down strongholds, casting down arguments and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God, bringing every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ, and being ready to punish all disobedience when your obedience is fulfilled." I Corinthians 10:3-6
Keep a list of daily must-do's and do them. This is the minimum that you need to complete. For me it includes: Laundry - at least 1 load, preferably 2 or more, Clean Kitchen before bed (or first thing in morning), Home school - Bible, English, Phonics/Reading with little ones, and Math, Daily Hygiene
Pray - Don't worry, PRAY! When you feel tempted to worry, take those thoughts captive by praying. "Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God," Philippians 4:6
Socialize. Don't hide yourself in your home. Go to church. Have someone over. Call your Mom! When I'm in a funk talking with others usually makes me feel better. We are social creatures, created to socialize....especially women! One word of warning though: make sure you are socializing with upbeat people and avoid complaining, depressed people. They have a tendency to drag us down mentally.
Read the Bible, God's Holy Word. Skip the TV. Stay off Facebook. Turn to God and His word.
Last but not least - Prank call your sister! And then laugh your tooshy off.☺♥☺♥☺

Turning my eyes to Jesus,
Michelle

Why Big Families Might Be Easier

2010-10-29T07:07:00.000-07:00

This morning a friend of mine tagged me on Facebook in a note about Why Big Families Might Be Easier. I couldn't agree more with this! I tracked it down and found it at NC Register. This is a humorous look at big family life but there is a lot of truth in it.

About the nature vs. nurture one. While I think nature does have a lot to do with how children respond, think and behave, I'm by no means downplaying the importance of "nurture". It certainly effects children in a tremendous way also! In fact, I'm counting on "nurturing" to make a HUGE difference in all of my children's lives but especially in my adopted children's lives. I think nurture can make a huge difference in child's life! BUT I'm not going to underestimate the power of "nature" either, lol. Example: I was certain that I had ruined my first child beyond any help. I was certain he was going to grow up to be a convict with a terrible temper, and he was going to need counseling to undo all the damage that I had done. He was strong willed. VERY STRONG WILLED. If I said blue, he said white. If I said don't, he immediately did that "don't" thing. He had a temper, even as a baby. He was loud. Rambunctious. Demanding (even though I NEVER gave in to this. He would have to say "please" to get stuff and would often do it through gritted teeth because he HATED giving in SO badly.). Then I had my second child. Who was sooooooooooo sweet and compliant. Extremely easy child. Always has been. Now, I'd love to take credit for my second son being such a sweet, compliant, helpful, young man. But the truth is I can't think of anything I did with my 2nd child that I didn't do with my first child. My parenting philosophies didn't change. I didn't see what I had done wrong (though I looked very critically at myself trying to discover the error of my ways, lol). I changed some of my parenting techniques when my oldest child was 5 and my 2nd child was 2. But my second child was easy from day 1. That was nature. And yeah. I blame my husband's genes for my first one:)

P.S. My strong willed oldest son is still strong willed, but I wouldn't trade him for the world. He has developed many godly-convictions that He would never compromise on for peer approval OR adult approval! He has a huge distaste for what he calls "posers" at his homeschool co-op...which is kids that act one way in front of an adult and another way when they're with their peers. He had a huge problem with his fellow homeschoolers who sat around cussing or talking about inappropriate topics and then would get up to go to a Bible study. He saw the hypocrisy and it disgusted him (he feels things strongly to say the least, lol...my second born is much more forgiving of these discrepancies in his peers). Strong-willed? Absolutely! But God has taken his "nature" and used me and my husband to "nurture" it, and I fully expect God to use him in amazing ways! I'm very proud of my strong-willed first born son.

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Why Big Families Might Be Easier

by Matthew Archbold Thursday, February 04, 2010

A woman said to me recently that my five children were very well behaved. It’s one of the best things I can hear so I thanked her. Then she asked me “how do you do it with so many?”
I told her that I don’t think I’d be a very good parent of one child or two. She didn’t believe my answer but honest to goodness, I sometimes think that having many children is easier than just one.
Why big families are easier:
Patience. I never have to teach patience. My children know that I can’t drop everything for them if I have a baby in my arms.
Work Ethic. My children have learned to work because there are always chores to do in a small house packed with little messy lunatics. And they all learn quickly that sometimes they have to clean up a mess even though they didn’t make it.
Humility. My children have learned it’s not always their turn. They’ve accepted they can’t always get their way because other people have to get their way sometimes. They’ve learned that some children are better at certain things than they are.
Foreign language skills. You can learn a lot of Spanish by watching ten years of Dora the Explorer that you just can’t pick up in two. And now with the Diego spin off I’m practically fluent.
Laughter. The children have learned to laugh at the insane non sequiturs of younger siblings. They’ve learned that laughing just feels better when seven people are doing it along with you.
Competition. Do I really need to go into this? Everything is a competition in big families. The children compete over who reads faster, who drinks their milk faster, who gets to the bathroom first…etc. Everything is a competition and they’re all keeping score.
Balance. The floor of the front room of my home is a minefield of toys and childhood paraphernalia. Just walking through the room requires great skill and balance. I’m absolutely convinced my two year old will be a favorite for Gold on the balance beam in the 2016 Olympics. (She might have to lay off the cookies a little but I’ll deal with that later.)
Life isn’t fair. Sometimes you just give it to the baby because you want a little quiet. Not all the time. But sometimes.
Just say “No.” Being able to say “no” may be the most undervalued skill in this world. The need to be liked is pervasive. The need to be cool even more so. Having brothers and sisters teaches children to say “no” about 143 times a day. It’s a good skill.
Praying. They learn that nothing beats praying together as a family.
Nature/Nurture. Having many children has taught me that nature has a lot more to do with who my kids are than nurture. This is helpful, especially when your children misbehave you don’t have to feel bad about it. Just say “Stupid nature!!!” and blame your spouse’s genes.
Namecalling. You can occasionally call your child by the wrong name and still not be considered a terrible parent. They know who you mean just from your tone. Sometimes if you need something done you can call the wrong name and someone will still show up. That helps.
Spying. My children have learned that they can’t get away with anything. I have spies who look a lot like them who are willing to drop the dime on them for anything. Even at school I’ve got a child in just about every grade. If they do something I’ll hear. That keeps them nervous. And I like keeping my kids a little nervous.
Friendship. The children have many friends. They’ve got girly friends, crying friends, fun loving friends, consoling friends, and crazy friends. And they all have the same last name. And they’ll be there forever for each other. No matter what.
Love. I think my children have learned to love because there are others around them to love and who love them. I honestly can think of no better way to teach children to love than siblings.

Random Thoughts

2010-10-24T11:38:00.000-07:00

Today's Sunday and I'm at home...again. Hannah has been sick this past week and still sounds croupy and nasty so I opted to keep her home even though I think she would have been fine at church. We have a lot of elderly people in our church and I really worry that they will catch things like this so in an effort to protect them I try to keep the kids at home, or away from those that I worry about. But I do miss my church family when I don't get to go!

On another note, I woke up thinking about "woe's". As in:

Woe to the mother who calls "evil" entertainment and then sits down to watch it on TV or allows her children to partake in it.
Woe to the mother who looks for loopholes in God's Word in order to justify wrong doings, actions, clothing and behavior rather than looking for the spirit of the Law in order to obey God.

Weird huh? Totally weird. But this is exactly what I woke up thinking. I was thinking about other "woe's" also but I can't remember them. I have NO idea what I was dreaming about prior to waking up, but something sure got my mind going. Maybe the Lord wanted to warn me from doing these things?

Then again maybe it came from my son going to another costume party last night. He's 14 and this is his second one this year. We don't celebrate Halloween, but we don't have any problem with costumes as long as the costumes are appropriate! He didn't even want to participate in the dress up. When I dropped him off there was nothing but girls their! Most of them were within 2 years of his age. He's 14. Almost all the girls there were dressed in very short costume outfits and one of them looked like she was in lingerie. It was made of the fishnet material and she wore high-heeled boots with this outfit. Although the skirt was just 2 or 3 inches above the knee, it would definitely not have passed my modesty standards for my daughters! Which leads me to the question, should I have even let my son go to this thing? How should I have handled this? Make an excuse to not leave him and then just leave (actually I would not have done this unless I truly had a reason...I would not lie to get him out of the party)? Maybe I should have been asking more questions before hand. And prayed about this. I didn't pray! God may have told me to turn down that invitation if I had actually asked HIM what to do before I RSVP'd. Luckily, my son handled everything like a pro. He said he thinks he's earned more browny-points with the Mom's then the girls, lol. He's told these girls for a long time that he doesn't "date". (This is a ludicrous idea to me anyhow. IF he wanted to date, I wouldn't let him until he was at least 16 anyhow). They asked why and so he told them that he's made a decision not to date because:

He feels the point of dating is to find your marriage partner. Since he's not ready to get married, he doesn't see any point in dating.
The Bible says to "guard your heart" and he feels one of the ways to do that is to not "give away" your heart to every girl that likes him or that he likes.
He's made a commitment to the Lord to wait until he's ready. He knows he's not ready!

I'm very proud of him. He was in a group of adoring girls and he stood firm to his convictions. He was away from his parents, and he was in a group that did not feel the same convictions so he could have easily have chosen to flirt or couple off with one of the girls. When one of the girls questioned what he believed, one of the other mother's spoke up after overhearing his reasons and said, "He's obviously more mature then you girls! Maybe in a couple of years you girls will become more mature and then decide to not date."

I'm a proud Mom. His light was shining for Him!

Life in fast motion

2010-10-21T18:21:00.000-07:00

Here are some recent pictures over the past few months. I still have a ton more to share. I don't even have any pictures of my oldest son in this set! We've had fun going on vacation to Kentucky/Ohio, soccer games, and just life in general.

This was taken at a living history museum in Ohio. Jessica just had to dress up in one of their old fashioned dress up outfits.

From a rest stop in TN. Boy! Do I need to lose a LOT of weight:(

When I zoomed in on this photo, I could actually see the pollen on the bee's legs.

Walking on water? LOL, not quite. This pool was a salt water pool...that was different.

My husband is the best father ever. He gives baths, plays with the kids, puts them to bed, prays with them, helps with laundry, cleans house when necessary, disciplines the children, coaches their teams at times, goes to ALL their functions, teaches them in Sunday School and children's church, heads up VBS every year, plans the fall festival. And all of this while going to school full time, working full time, and being the assistant pastor at our church.

Such a beautiful snake!

All of these pictures were from the Cincinnati Zoo. This Rhino was enjoying a cool mud bath on a very hot day:)

Timmy is so funny! I had to take this pic in a hurry because he said it was hard to stand like that, lol.

He is such a sweetie! He had so much fun roaming the gardens at the Creation Museum in Kentucky.

My sweet girl looks like a tropical flower. Goodness I love this girl!

This was atop a pole down by the Ohio River. I don't know when this was placed there originally but it quickly became apparent how far we have left symbol of the way people once thought. There was a very long trail with the supposed evolutionary stages nearby, that visitors could see on the sidewalk that stretched for what seemed like miles.

Many, many...many Saturdays are spent at the soccer fields cheering this kid on. Good thing I like soccer!

One of God's strange and wonderful creations. I really need to look this bad boy up!

Winning your children's souls to Christ: Part 2, Teaching Kids to Pray

2010-10-20T16:22:00.000-07:00

Dedication and Disclaimer: For my children, whom I love with all my heart!
I am posting this for my own benefit and for the benefit of my children. This helps me because it gives me a go-to list of practical ideas on how to accomplish the vision that God has given me. Sometimes life happens and I lose my way...and my vision. Things like this are reminders and I love a check list! So posts like this serve as a way to remind me of forgotten ideas or truths and also as a checklist. Often, I post as if I'm talking to someone else but since I feel completely unqualified to do that, I feel the need to let anyone who might happen to read this, I'm really talking to myself...and hopefully, my children. I often worry that I might sound like a know it all, when actually I know very little.I hope that this will benefit them someday when raising their own children and I hope it will benefit them today because they can see their mother's heart and be blessed by it. Always and forever, I hope my posts speak to them of how much I love them and direct them back to our Most Holy God.

Last post I mentioned the need for parents to win their children to the Lord. This post I want to tell what I'm doing to fulfill that vision of raising a Godly generation that will in turn raise their children to serve the Living God.
It almost seems to be a cliché to say this but it is still one of the most important things you can do to win your children to Christ. We must teach them about prayer. Being a Christian is not just about "believing" in Christ. It's about having a relationship with Him. Prayer is all about relationship. One could say, "Me and Obama are very close. We have a relationship with each other." But if Obama and you have never met, or perhaps you met while he was on the campaign trail but you don't talk to one another, the truth is you really don't have a relationship with him. The same is true with the Lord. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying one is saved by prayer. Prayer is the result of salvation not the cause. God desires to have a personal relationship with you, so prayer is the result of a relationship. Teach your kids to fellowship with God through prayer. Teach them about how God answers prayer. Pray for your children and others. Make it your personal ministry to pray for your family. It is not something that your children will soon forget. Abraham Lincoln once said, "I remember my mother's prayers and they have always followed me. They have clung to me all my life."

Practical Application:

My sister told me about this idea and I love it. Pray by the timer. I tried it for the first time yesterday and I now plan to do this regularly. The Bible says that we should pray without ceasing in I Thessalonians 5:17. This is a very practical way to teach your children to continually be in prayer and to take everything to Him in prayer. Set a timer for 60 minutes. When the timer goes off, pray together. Reset the timer for 60 minutes and then pray again when it goes off. Do this all day. This was a great blessing to me yesterday, because I was soooo stressed. The stress didn't go away. But the kids saw me talking to the Lord about it. That's a very important lesson for them to learn. They saw me take my burdens to Him as well as praising Him. They too prayed every hour and were taking their concerns and praises to the Lord. I can't thank my sister enough for telling me about this idea!
Keep a list of prayer requests that your family is praying for. As the Lord answers those requests, point them out to your children including the ones He says NO to! I think we often forget to let our children no how God answers our prayers and all of the answers are important: the yes's, the no's and the wait's. And we must not fall into the habit of only telling them about the yes's either. How many times does God say "No" to us? How many times does He say, "Not now"? We need to remind our children that those are indeed answers to prayer. No matter what the answer is we should teach our kids to thank God and accept them.
Pray for your children. God has told us that we can come boldly before His throne through prayer. We should not waste this liberty! I can not think of anything more important that we can do for our children then talking to God on their behalf, at His throne of grace. We cannot change their hearts, but God can. We cannot be with them everywhere they go but God can. We cannot save their souls but God can. We have access to the King at any time, day or night as long as our prayers are not hindered by sin. This is an awesome privilege and our children are so worth it.

Some of my favorite things to pray for my children is:

for God's workings in their Salvation

His protection of them

That they will get caught when they sin

For them to grow in wisdom and stature

Purity in heart and body

Their future spouse and children

For personal issues that they may be going through

Lisa T. Bergen gave a wonderful list of things for parents to pray for.

By Lisa T. Bergren
I pray you’ll get caught doing things wrong—before they get too big
I pray you’ll fail—in things that don’t matter
I pray you’ll have to say you’re sorry—and get really good at it, so that when the time’s right, you can always find the courage to say the words
I pray you’ll cry, really hard—so you feel free to express both tears of anguish and tears of joy
I pray you’ll sweat—and learn what it means to work really hard for something you want or to reach a goal or to cross a finish line
I pray you’ll get lost—and discover you have the Compass within to help you find your way
I pray you’ll get weary—enough to know that you can’t do everything on your own strength
I pray you’ll give up—and rely on God for your strength
I pray you’ll experience unanswered prayers—and discover deeper, wider trust
I pray you’ll feel foolish—and realize we’re all nothing, without Christ
I pray you’ll suffer heartbreak—and grow in the discovery of how your Creator can use all things for good
I pray you’ll be shattered—and be reborn in the Spirit
I pray you’ll be near-sighted—unable to see anything but God, right beside you
I pray you’ll be far-sighted—unable to see anything but God, right there on the horizon
I pray you’ll lose a job—and know that your Provider is ever present
I pray you’ll brush up against death—and recognize that this is not the end
I pray you’ll have to wait—and learn the value of patience
I pray you’ll be deaf—to all but the Father’s voice
I pray you’ll be scared—of living without God in your life
I pray you’ll take crazy risks—and dare to adventure where your Shepherd leads
Amen.
Feel free to share this/forward to friends—just be sure to include my name [Lisa T. Bergren]with it. Thanks!

(Note: Please give credit to Lisa T. Bergren if you use this...it is definitely not my writing!)

Prayer is so important for our children, with our children and by our children. Winning our children's souls to Christ means that we must disciple our children by teaching them about prayer. We must not neglect in teaching our children to pray or in praying for our children.

Winning your children's souls to Christ: Part 1, The Need

2010-10-19T08:32:00.000-07:00

Evangelical Christians are encouraged across the world to witness to others and I'm so glad they are. If there is one thing that the church in America has failed to do (as a whole), is to win souls to Christ. I heard a speaker two days ago give statistics on the spiritual condition of America and let me tell you folks, those statistics were bleak. At the rate that so-called Christians are leaving the church right now, there will be very few Christians left here in the USA in just a few years. America, the most "Christian" nation of the world, has the highest divorce rate in the world. We are a nation of people who are now rejecting God's word in favor of political correctness. We embrace murder and call it a woman's "choice". We cater to abominations and call it "gay civil rights". We reject God's word for fear that we will appear intolerant or that it will be "offensive" to others.

All of this reminds me of the story of Lot in Genesis. Remember that? Lot was living in Sodom and Gomorrah and God sent the death angel there to wipe them off the planet. The angel stops at Abraham's abode first and Abraham tries to convince the death angel to spare the cities down in the valley. Lot and his family were living there. Abraham eventually convinces the death angel to spare those wretched cities if he could find only 10 righteous people there. Just 10. Abraham must have thought he had this cat in the bag. After all he knew Lot lived there with his wife. They had several daughters there. Some were even married, so he had son in laws....and perhaps grand children. Surely, Lot had discipled his own family, right? Sadly, no. Lot was a failure as a father and spiritual leader. He failed to disciple his children, his wife and his community. His story ends with one of the most disgusting perversions in the Bible, a drunk who had sex with his daughters and daughters who WANTED to have sex with their own father so they could give birth to illegitimate children.

More than ever I realize that I need to be winning my children's souls to Christ. I have a vision. A vision that not just my children will be sold-out, born-again, God-fearing, Jesus freaks...but that my great-great-great-great grandchildren will be the same. How can I do that? What can I do now to effect my descendants?

The salvation of generations of my descendants is dependent the discipleship of my children. Soul winning is a basic part of being a Christian, but it must begin with our own children. My own children and grandchildrens souls hang in the balance.

I'm going to begin writing my own "How To" series. I don't pretend to have anything to really offer others. I'm writing this solely to organize my own thoughts and for my children. I'm no expert. I have to work with what the Lord has taught me thus far!

Wasting time....

2010-10-09T06:26:00.000-07:00

This morning my Michael went to take his SAT's. I was so nervous for him. I get more nervous for my kids than I do for myself. And after he left I went and sat on the computer, on Facebook. What a waste of time! I should have turned to His precious words for me, the words that bring LIFE. and Peace. It's not too late! I think I will read a couple of blogs that encourage me spiritually for my devotion and then go dive deeper into the living Word.

Have a glorious, Christ-filled day!

Respecting Your Man

2010-10-01T17:08:00.000-07:00

The other day I was in Wal Mart doing some grocery shopping when an interesting thing happened that made me think about how I treat my husband and how I show him respect. A family was slowly making their way up the aisle, coming towards me; we were headed in opposite directions. As the wife was staring at some crackers near me, she whispered quietly to her husband telling him what she wanted. He came forward to get it, standing directly in the path of my cart. Since I was making my way up the aisle, when the husband reached out to get what his wife needed, he stood blocking my way for just a little bit. He looked a little confused, as if he wasn't exactly which product his wife wanted. He stared for just a few seconds at the product in his hand before he turned to hand it to his wife. That's when I noticed his wife's expression. Can you picture a face with utter disgust, impatience, and irritation on it? That's the expression his wife had on her face as she literally snatched the product from his hands. I think she was embarrassed that her husband had blocked me for just a few seconds but I'm not really sure why she was upset. Maybe he got the wrong product? I know she quickly moved out of the way, so at the time I thought she was worried that maybe she was in *my* way since her husband blocked my way for just a few seconds.

I felt so badly for this man! I wanted say to this wife, "It's okay....really." Clearly he was trying to please his wife and was trying really hard to get the "right one".

Sometimes when I see things like this it reminds me, as the bride of Ronnie, that I too have a countenance...and it's not always a good one! Do I express joy in my countenance towards my husband? Do I let him see me smile, showing my joy and pleasure in him often, especially in public? Do my words reflect respect, kindness and a peaceful spirit to my husband?

Wives, a lot of marriages could be saved if we women would learn to respect our men. I find it interesting that we women were not commanded to "love" our husbands in Ephesians 5:33, but to respect our husbands. "Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband". I find this interesting because most books on marital relationships will tell you that a husbands number one need is to be respected.

I need to guard my words AND my facial expressions. I cannot respect my husband while scowling at him for every little thing. If respect towards my husband is not seeded in my heart then you certainly won't find it on my face.

It's All About Being Together

2010-08-29T16:58:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow morning, early...real early, we are leaving for a field trip vacation to Florence, KY. The kids are all excited. My husband is just elated. I'm already cherishing the memories that will be made.

The excitement this year is not really about where we're going, although I'm sure where we're going will be wonderful. What I'm most excited about is the time that we will spend together, making memories. There's something about having your boy-man growing taller than you, shopping for colleges, and planning his first moves as a soon-to-be man that makes a mama savor the moments of togetherness like never before. You see my little boy is standing on the edge of his nest getting ready to fly. I'm sure we'll take other family vacations together, but it won't be the same! I'm savoring this trip slowly, drinking it in like a cool glass of sweet tea, on a hot summer's evening.

So prayerfully, I have been asking God for direction and wisdom for this trip. With a family of nine, you are bound to have things that come up, as we all have to deal with pet peeves, occassional thoughtless behavior or just personality differences. But just like one can't count on revival beginning in another person, I'm not expecting loving attitudes, tolerance and patience to begin (or should I say continue?) in other people either. So a lot of my prayer has been spent asking the Lord to help me be easier to live with on this trip.

Because it really is not about where we're going....it's really about making wonderful shared memories, loving one another, and making each other feel special and important. Time with family is fleeting but charity endureth forever.

How Real Revival Begins

2010-08-28T21:05:00.000-07:00

*Dedicated to my children so one day they will know their mother's heart on the importance of true revival and when they need guidance they can begin here. I love you Michael, Stephen, Timothy, Sarah, Joshua, Jessica and Hannah!

There's been a recent "Like" group on facebook going around that says, "Let's start a Christian Revival right here, right now! Click "like" if you believe that Jesus is Lord!!"

Is this really how revival starts? Do we even know how revival looks? I wish that clicking "like" on facebook would cause a revival...if it did, a revival would be in progress already.

True revival will never come from clicking "like" on any social network. Revival is a work of the heart not a work of the fingers. It is hard work. Spiritual surgery that leaves ones heart broken. Only when the heart is truly broken can one's heart be healed.

Real revival begins with being broken about your own sin. Psalm 51 outlines this beautifully. It's begins with searching the depths of your heart for sin. Big sin. Small sin. Hidden sin. It begins with identifying the things you have turned into an idol, whether its a job, being entertained, or church work. It begins with examining what you are really loving with your heart, soul and mind. A half-heart for God is always a heart in need of revival.

Real revival looks like praying. It's very essence will be repentance and confession and then more repentance. Without these two elements, I just don't believe that revival can truly occur. Revival rides in on gut-wrenching, brutally-honest, self-examination but it will leave on a light heart, renewed hope and deeper love for the One who bore your guilt and shame. Revival looks like weeping before the Savior for making idols of the cares of this world or because they are coddling sin in their hearts instead of dealing with it as a the sin sickness that it is. It follows confession as the broken-hearted person turns to the only One who can both deal with the punishment of that sin and forgive it. As the person confesses before the Lord, a revived heart cries out just as the Psalmist did in Psalms , "For You do not desire sacrifice, or else I would give it" David was willing to do whatever the Lord required of Him. And what was it that the Lord required of him?

"You do not delight in burnt offering. The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit, a broken and contrite heart - These, O God, You will not despise." (emphasis mine)

God is not looking for people to "sacrifice" by coming to church more, though that may be the inevitable result of a truly penitent heart. God is not looking for the sacrifice of tithing more, but that too may be the inevitable result of a truly penitent heart also.

The only thing God is requiring of us so that we can truly have revival is a contrite and broken heart, and a broken spirit. These are the true workings of revival. Anything is a fraud, or a nice gesture. Or worse, a half-hearted gesture to try to allieve guilt by attempting to buy off a Holy God's disapproval. Our works are never accepted until we do them as a result of the work He has done in our hearts...the work of a broken and contrite spirit within us.

God is serious about revival. Are we? Will we as a family continue to coddle our own sins. Will we continue as a church to pray for the revival of everyone else? Will we as a nation continue to taunt God with our love of:
sin over the love of the Spirit?
playing with God rather praying to God?
entertaining ourselves at every opprotunity rather than entering into His house at every opprotunity?
calling Dr. Phil for advice rather than calling on the Living God?
worshipping creation rather than worshipping the Creator?

I want revival to begin. I want it to start in me.

Attaining Righteousness

2010-08-22T12:38:00.000-07:00

I recently was thinking about how much I wanted my life to please Him and how often I fail at that. I'm as "normal" and plain as every other person that I know. One of my first thoughts after my husband surrendered to God's call to preach was, "He can't be a preacher because I'm just a common Christian with sin. How can *I* be a preacher's wife?"

The Lord has gently guided me during these years and He's taught me a lot. I've learned that no one is perfect, not even pastor's wives. I've learned that He'll still be working on me and my sin till the day I die, but hopefully not the same sin. I've learned that no matter what, no matter how much I pray, read God's word or go to church, I will always be working on sanctification.

Is righteousness really attainable? Only by way of the cross.

My oldest son said something this afternoon that was interesting. He said, "Isn't it weird that an instrument that was intended to torture people came to symbolize holiness?" One thought went through my mind.

Only Christ can make the unholy things of this world into something holy.

Christ can make the unholy....holy.

The Treasure of our Children

2010-08-12T07:40:00.000-07:00

The world is abuzz with news of school district after school district of children reporting back to school. I just read someone's email who said she was going to meet her children's teacher, the one in whom she is entrusting her children. I cringed inside when I read that.

You see this is just plain backwards to me. As a mother, if I were going to go hire someone to be my children's caretakers while I did whatever, every day, you better believe there would be background checks. (Not that these are by any means full proof) And interviews. With LOTS of probing questions. Why do we somehow think it's acceptable to send our kids to school with strangers, whom we've never met....or interviewed? Am I the only mother that thinks this is crazy? I think of all the different stories I hear every year about teachers abusing children, persecuting them for their Christian and/or political beliefs and I wonder, how could I ever trust these people with my treasures? Treasures entrusted to me and my husband....not strangers.

I am well aware of all the wonderful teachers out there. We have one WONDERFUL school teacher at our church. She sometimes asks for prayer for different children at her school. She's a wonderful lady. Really wonderful. But I would never leave my children with her for 6 or 7 hours per day. Never. Even as wonderful as she is, she posted on facebook the other day something along the lines of, "all you ever hear about the public schools is negative but there is really a lot more positive than negative". This wonderful Christian teacher sees the public schools as "more positive than negative".

We are fundamentally different in our beliefs. I think the drugs that are RAMPANT at our local high school is more negative than any perceived positive that Gym class may bring. I think the blatant, God-denying, evolution-teaching classes (even at the elementary level), are by FAR MORE NEGATIVE THAN ANY PERCEIVED POSITIVE such as music class. I think the sexual atmosphere between the students...even at the kindergarten level, is by FAR MORE NEGATIVE THAN ANY PERCEIVED POSITIVE. I think the godless atmosphere, IMPOSED on the children by rules like, "In the morning we will have one minute of silence for meditation. This is not to be construed in any way as prayer. Prayer is not allowed, even if it is student led." is by far MORE NEGATIVE THAN POSITIVE.

My oldest son is a Senior this year. He's been homeschooled since he was in kindergarten. I have to admit that every time I see that date "5/27", something gets caught in my throat. The time flew by so quickly. I miss the little boy he once was. I'm proud of the man he is becoming. I'm having a hard enough time, just wondering, "Did I teach him enough about the Lord? Did I prepare him enough for his adult journey and walk with the Lord?". I wouldn't change the past 17 years for anything. There is no one...no one that I ever would have trusted with my son's teaching and upbringing outside myself or my husband. Not even a wonderful Christian teacher. The irony is that I know of Christian teachers who feel the exact same way that I do. They homeschool.

The very best Christian or Public school will never be able to compete with a loving father and mother, committed to the Lord and committed to raising their children for His service. I treasure my kids too much to entrust a stranger with their teaching and raising. I am committed to running the race that He has set before me. I am committed to teaching my children at home till they graduate or the Lord returns, whichever comes first. I am committed.

P.S.
Rereading this makes me realize that it may come across to some as being judgmental of their decision to send their kids to public or private school. Nothing could be further from my mind. Many, many families who treasure their children send their kids to the more traditional schooling. They may be baffled why I don't want what they construe as the "best" for my children. I do not look down upon anyone who sends their kids to others to educate. I cannot judge the motive of their heart, nor do I attempt to. But from my perspective, for my children, this is what's best. This is the job God has given me to do for my family. Each year at this time, I find myself renewing my resolve to educate my children at home. This post is born out of that resolve.

Our Homeschool Curriculum

2010-08-04T09:48:00.000-07:00

I've added a new page for any curious onlookers of the curriculum we are using this year. Picking out the curriculum is the easy part. Creating a schedule to fit all this in is the hard part. And creating lessons plans. That's hard too.

But on to the bright side, I bought a really awesome software this year to assist me in the keeping up with the records for all these kids and also to help with lesson planning. It was the next to the best purchase I've made all year. It's called Edu-Track and you can actually download premade lessons plans (for an extra fee) that other homeschool Mom's have come up with. I'll gladly pay $1.99 for someone else's lesson plans for Story of the World: The Ancients. or for Easy Grammar Grade 5 lesson plans, etc. It didn't have all of my curriculum, but it did have a lot of them, thereby saving me days and days of work. This will keep up with grades, transcripts, chores, and even diplomas. You can easily print out your child's assignments for the week so you can give it to them and the child can check it off as the complete each subject.

Check out Edu-Track if you want to simplify your school planning and organization.

Anxiety....for real?

2010-08-03T08:13:00.000-07:00

I realized something yesterday as I walked up three flights of stairs to get to the courtroom for jury duty. As I was walking I literally thought I was going to have a heart attack. My heart was beating so hard, it hurt and I could hear it beating. I was so breathless, that I thought I may pass out. I knew as I walked up those stairs that this was not normal. After I got to the top, I wondered if what I was having was a panic attack. I felt like I couldn't breathe.

I've had to testify before in some foster children's TPR case. I was extremely nervous about that also. I cried on the stand and it was more because of my nerves than because I had to relay what the kids had told me.

Then I was thinking about how nervous I am about the upcoming Nursery worker meeting I'm having. I actually have had a couple of scary dreams about it. I'm that nervous.

So it finally hit me yesterday. This is soooo not normal. Why do I get so nervous when I'm going into a courthouse? Or have to speak in front of people?

The Bible says to not be anxious about anything. Now that I realize I have some serious anxiety issues, how do I solve this? I don't sit around thinking about all of the "bad" things that could happen. I enjoy talking to people, one-on-one...or sometimes if I know the people, in informal groups.

Is this part of my anger issues (which, by the way, has made great improvement this year....God is changing me!)? Could my anger be an anxiety problem?

I asked God to change me. I've begged God to change me! I've meditated on scripture and sought His face so much this year.

Yes, Lord.
I hear You.
This problem is bigger than me.
I need You.
To change me.
Amen.

Jury duty

2010-08-02T14:15:00.000-07:00

So I was sent one of those letters that summons you for jury duty. As I went to the courthouse this morning, I was imagining different traffic violation scenarios that I might be asked to determine guilt or innocence for. This would have been somewhat simple.

Imagine my surprise when I was called back as potential juror for a murder trial. I thought my heart was going to beat out of me. Did you know, you can tell a lot about the case just by the questions that a lawyer prosecuting or defense, asks the potential jurors? I didn't either before today.

For instance, if a defense lawyer asks, "This was clearly a murder. You will be required to look at a lot of pictures that contain images of the victim after she was murdered on the crime scene. Do you think this will bother you?" you know this is gonna get gruesome. I'm a PG kind of girl...in fact, I can't watch the crime scene shows on TV. Too graphic.

Or what if the prosecuting asks you, "Have you ever witnessed, been a victim of, or perpetrated domestic violence?", you know that this is going to involve domestic violence.

And one other tale-tale sign that this is going to be a difficult case is when the defense lawyer asks you if you think that law enforcement should ALWAYS gather and examine DNA evidence when it's available.

It's been a lonnnnng day. I'm not a juror. My heart can start beating normally again.

Summer Marriage Challenge: Prioritizing

2010-07-26T09:29:00.000-07:00

I love challenges like this! Courtney's challenge one week was for us wives to make a list of things that we already do and then ask our husbands to tell us what their priority would be for those things.

I know from past experience, that this can be very beneficial to our marriage so I decided to expand this challenge a bit...to make it my own. I made a list of things I do...and I don't do, but I know I should be doing them. Or at least doing better than what I am doing anyhow.

So I listed 11 things, in random order and asked him to label the top 5 in order of importance to him. My original list included:

Home school children
Laundry
Clean house
Cook
Devotions with kids
Respect you
Calm, cheerful demeanor
Church ministry
Alone time (read: make time for intimacy)
Date night
Keep kids quiet while you study

My husband easily honed in on the most important ones to him. Incidentally, I would have labelled the list very similarly for myself in order of importance to my marriage and family. Here's his list in order of importance to him:

Calm, cheerful demeanor - I was not surprised at all by this. My husband really hates it when I'm grumpy and disagreeable. And who can blame him? I feel the same way about him! I set the tone for this family...the atmosphere of my home is highly dependent on my attitude. I would have picked this as #1 as well.
Home School children - 2nd on his list and on mine as well. Very important to us both, and I'm so glad that we both agree on the importance of this task. This task really effects all of the other tasks/goals in our lives. Often my thought process goes something like this: I have a load of laundry that needs folded...but I need to finish math with Joshua. The laundry must wait because Josh's math is more important.
Alone time - 3rd on my husbands list and I would assume for most men. This tells me that he'd rather have alone time than clean underwear, lol.
Devotions with kids - We both have taken scriptures like Deuteronomy 6 very seriously and so this priority ranked in his top 5. Right now, he's relying a lot of my as his help meet, to help him with this because of his busy schedule. I love that this made his top 5 list as well! I'm not sure where I would have placed it because we already talk throughout the day about the Lord and what He desires of us, have Bible study, etc. I think I would agree though. #4 is the best place for this priority:)
Clean House - Last on his top 5 list is clean house. He apparently values this but he certainly has things that are more important to him. Nevertheless, this is important to him. Our whole family functions so much better when our home is neat, clutter free, and organized. My kids actually learn better! I find that everyone is in a better mood when our home is clean:) I would point out that my husband made it a point to tell me that he considers clean laundry a part of a clean home.

So there it is! Top 5. My husband also told me that he feels that I already have #5...um, correction #6 on the 1 thru 11 list, down so well, that he didn't feel the need to even add that to the priority list:)

2010-07-24T16:05:00.000-07:00

I'm a very blessed woman to get to go on a date with this very HOT man! And i'm not just talking about the temperature either:)

Opinions or Opinionated?

2010-07-24T08:00:00.000-07:00

I'm having one of my "just thinking" moments.

Is there a difference between having an opinion and being opinionated? I just skimmed a blog that was all about peaceful parenting, and their latest blog was actually on how to "properly" "wear" your baby. After skimming through this article, I had a vision of someone coming up to me to tell me that if I just adjusted my baby a little it would be better for the baby. I had this vision because I have had similar things happen to me sooooo many times in my life. I guess I must have some sort of face that begs for people to tell me how to do things the right way.

I once had a woman tell me that my son died from his vaccine. I knew her 3 minutes when she told me this. I met her in a park and she was not a medical professional.
This week, I had a woman, a very young woman at that with no children, tell me what toys to buy for the church nursery. She saw me standing there in a Walmart toy aisle looking at some of the play food/kitchen stuff as I contemplated what I thought best for our particular needs. She asked me if I was buying for a child's birthday and when I told her what I was buying for, she immediately told me that, "I recommend you get the sets. I used to be room mates with a girl who babysat and that's what she recommended because they have parts that go together." Um, thank you?
I've had more people than I can count tell me how homeschooling is going to mess my kids up. One woman told me that her sister helped write public school curriculum, and her sister told her that parents can't possibly properly school their children so she "knew" it was true.
And don't even get me started about the people who tell me that I "have enough children" so I shouldn't have any more.

I've even found myself offering unsolicited advice before. I gave a single woman selling donuts at Walmart a mini-sermon the other day on how children are a gift from God and the reason most people complain about having children is because they don't teach their children how to behave.

It's not that all these people are wrong. It's just that, well, most of it is based on their opinions and they feel so strongly that their opinions are right, they feel they have the right or even the responsibility to tell other's what they believe. Most don't even recognize that they are sharing an opinion as opposed to a fact. While I have no problem with a blog that is based on one's opinion, I do think we should be careful about what we choose to share with other's ....and how we share it.

Sometimes it's easier to recognize other people's problems rather than our own and unless we are very deliberate in examining ourselves, it's easy to become judgmental in a very negative way. So in the spirit of self-examination and because I come from a long line of opinionated women here are some questions that, in my opinion {big grin}, I should be asking myself:

Is what I believe on a particular subject really a fact, or is it just an opinion?

Do I recognize the possibility that I could be wrong?

Am I pushy with my opinion, offering it to people that really don't want it or need it?

When I do give my opinion, do I do so humbly, without pridefullness?

Do I maintain a gentle and quiet spirit when I share my opinion or am I loud, demanding or condescending with those who may not agree with me?

Scriptures I'm pondering:

A fool uttereth all his mind: but a wise man keepeth it in till afterwards.
(Proverbs 29:11)

In the multitude of words there wanteth not sin: but he that refraineth his lips is wise.
(Proverbs 10:19)

Just Thinking,

Michelle

Last Thought: I am a woman of strong opinions and I do not believe this to be wrong. In fact, I would even say there IS such thing as a right opinion. The purpose of this blog is multifaceted, but definitely includes my attempt to self-reflect on a myriad of things. How I share my opinion, my underlying motivation for sharing my opinions, and my attitude is what I'm really examining here. This in NO WAY means that I think one is wrong for feeling very strongly about something or even sharing those strong opinions, in certain situations! It's all about one's heart...in my opinion! :)

Homemaking with a humble spirit

2010-07-23T11:03:00.000-07:00

I do not want to build a home to look down upon others or compete with others. My homebuilding is not a race, nor is it a track record of how well I am doing spiritually. It comes from a heart of love to do the right thing and heart of obedience to serve the Lord.

- June Fuentess, A Wise Woman Builds Her Home

This morning my sister called to update me on a situation she and I have been praying for. It's a very sad situation and my heart is breaking for the children involved and the parents. One of the parents was arrested for DUI and she had three of her little ones in the vehicle with her. This is one of those situations that I consider "unthinkable". I would never do such a thing...endangering my children like that. It wasn't that I was sitting around thinking, "I'm better because I don't drink and I definitely wouldn't drive if I did." No, my thoughts were more along the lines of, "How could she do this? What was she thinking? Doesn't she care about her kids?" On and on my thoughts went. Then when I went to get in the shower, I started to pray for this family. The Lord spoke to me, "Do you think you're qualified to pray for her sin, when you yourself sin?" Don't get me wrong...this was not a condemning thought, so much as a realization. He knows my sin. Sin I haven't confessed because I forgot it or didn't recognize it. It was convicting. So my prayer time turned to confession time for myself.

Later, as I headed to shed to look for next years school books, I had more conversations with the Lord. But this time it was a plea to Him for not just forgiveness, but from protection from a judgmental, holier-than-thou spirit.

Now, I've just read a blog from one my favorite blogs, a lovely post titled Grace and Mercy. This is what I need. Judgmenatalness cannot coexist with grace and mercy.